Duty
by WIWJ
Summary: Sequel to Lies. Which I gave a silly ending.. sorry Michael and Fiona try and figure out married life and the team embarks on it's first real mission as Government Spies.
1. Chapter 1

"I don't understand what the problem is." He said flatly. " I got the job you got the wedding. You got what you wanted, I got what I wanted." He knows it's mean. He really does Unfortunately, not until after he says it. She lowers the binoculars to her waist and stares out the window. He winces at the look on her face. "I didn't mean it like that."

"Yes you did." She says softly. "That's exactly how you meant it."

"I didn't mean for it to come out like that." He shook his head, closing his eyes. "I didn't-."

"That's just what every new bride longs to hear." She whispered still transfixed by windows view of the night sky.

"We both wanted to be together. If I was going to get my job back it was the only way.."

"Just stop." She pleaded. "I'm going to-." She searched her brain for something actual. Something job related. She came up blank. "I don't know what I'm going to do but it's not going to be standing around in this little room with you."

"Fi." He called after her softly, knowing full well she wasn't going to stop. "Fiona. I'm sorry."

The door shut on his apology midway through. He screwed his face up before cursing into the dark.

…...

"How'd surveillance go?" Sam asked him playfully over a pile of Charger parts when Michael returned to he house a few hours later.

"Just tell me she came here." He moaned.

"She's inside with your mom. I wouldn't go in unarmed." Sam looked at his current project again before smacking it a few more times with a rubber mallet.

"I thought Nate's friends were coming to take a look." He gestured wildly to the pile of rubble.

"They did. They're ordering parts. I'm just still trying to salvage as much of the original as possible." Axe explained before giving his piece another whack. Mike crumpled into what was left of the passenger seat, wincing at the charred smell that still emanated from the wreck.

"This is a total disaster." He groaned into his hands.

"The car or your marriage?" Sam asked, tossing the rubber mallet in one direction and the newly un-dented piece in the other. "Cause I can help you with the car."

"I just can't stop opening my big mouth." Westen admitted.

"Ooh. Yeah Buddy. If you don't have anything nice to say-." Sam made a whistling noise to end the thought.

"She thinks I married her so I could keep the job." He explained.

"Is that wrong?" Sam shook his head. "That's why you got married isn't it?"

"No. I married her so I could keep her." He grumbled, Sam gave him a long look before he grunted and looked at his hands. "and the job."

"Yeah. I think she's just wondering if push came to shove which one you'd pick." He filled him in helpfully, stretching out to reach another part that was still shaped similarly to how it had been. "Pretty sure you guys are having the same argument you've been having all along."

"Yeah thanks for the help." Mike snapped, hoping out of the chair and starting towards the house. He stood in the kitchen looking out into the living room. His mother and wife, both leaning back from the table with arms crossed, turned in unison to glare at him.

"Look who's home." Madelyn called in her sweetest, most fake voice. "It's my son, Cyrano de Bergerac."

"Mom, can I talk to Fi alone please?" He asked, his head bobbing down.

"Sure." She sang pushing up to her feet and stomping off. "Nothing could ever go wrong with that."

He waited until he heard the door shut before taking a deep breath.

"You know you took the car right? And I left my wallet in there so.. I didn't have any money for a cab. So I walked. Like eight miles." She didn't move, just continued to stare. "Tell me what you need me to say."

"I don't think you can." She whispered.

"Fiona." He deflated, moving into the dinning room and sitting across from her, gathering her hand in his. "Why can't I want both?"

"I just want you to want me_ more_." She whispered, he kissed her knuckles. "I want you to be married to me because you love me _more_."

"You think I don't?" His forehead wrinkled, and his hand cupped her face. "Fi.." She looked at his large hands over her own.

"I think if you had to pick.." She sniffed. "You did have to pick.."

"And I picked you. I told them it was up to them and that I wouldn't come back with out you."

"You tied their hands." She shook her head. "You knew they'd-."

"Fiona." He rolled his eyes, swinging his arms away from her and letting them smack against his thighs. "I can't do anything right here can I?"

She pressed her lips into a tight line.

"I don't know."

He nodded, running his tongue over his teeth.

"Okay." He pulled back his hand from her face, squeezing her hand before letting it go. "I'm going to go back to the loft before my meeting with Jesse. Are you staying here?"

She looked at her hands.

"I um.. need to run the Lieutenants file." She was still working. That meant something didn't it?

"So.." He looked at the ceiling. "Do you want to go back with me?"

"I'll pick you up?" She lifted her eyes. "On the way to Jesse's?" He nodded before standing, pressing his hands against the table. He leaned forward, hesitating for less then a second before kissing the corner of her mouth.

"Michael?" She called after him softly and he spun on his heels hopefully. "You don't have a car."

His lips twitched up a little, at least she cared.

"I'll have Sam take me." She nodded, still looking down at the table.

…

"Hey it's the newlyweds." Jesse called, pushing himself up from the desk and maneuvering his crutches under his arms.

"Don't get up on our account!" Michael held his hands out.

"How's it going?" Jesse grinned between the two of them.

"May I?" Fiona smiled, holding her palm up to his computer, he nodded.

"What happened?' Jesse asked quietly rolling his eyes back. "What did you do?"

"It's nothing." He waved him off, looking towards his wife, she bit her lip and starred at the keyboard. . "Work stuff."

"Yeah right." Jesse rolled his eyes. "What ever. Let me tell you what I found out about-."

Michael lifted his hand to stop him before sliding up behind Fiona at the desk.

"Com code first." He reminded, tapping in her newly acquired numbers. "Then ID." He nodded at her and she entered her ID, looking back at him to insure she'd done it correctly. "Now password." He kissed the top of her head before moving away.

She watched him before returning to the key pad.

"Rookies." Jesse teased, before lowering himself into a chair. Michael forced a smile before listening to his coworkers latest update.

…...

It was the first night they didn't go to bed together. He had still been sitting on the balcony with his lap top when she had turned out the lights and climbed under the covers. It was the first night since they'd been married that he hadn't carried her, led her, or tossed her, onto the it himself.

He stood at the foot of the bed for a few minutes watching her sleep. God he loved her. He loved her more than anything. Anything.

He didn't really understand why he couldn't tell her that. Why he couldn't drop to his knee's beside her right then and tell her what she meant to him.

Fear was part of it. Fear was a big part of it. He pulled off his t shirt and slid under the comforter. She shifted towards him instinctively and he welcomed her warm body and the silky tickle of her hair. He wrapped her body in his arms, clenching his eyes shut and inhaling the scent of her.

"I'm sorry." She whispered softly from his chest.

"No." He exhaled, kissing her head. "Don't."

"Michael.."

"Do you want me to pick?" His chest was tight, and the words grunted out of him. "Do you want me to walk away?"

"From what?" She teased and he gripped her more tightly.

"The job Fi." He whined. "Do you want me to-?"

"Michael I want you to be happy." She sighed. "The job to makes you happy."

"I need _you_." He told her bluntly, his hands sliding up and down her slim arms. "I _need_ you more."

"You have me." She sighed, slipping her hands to his chest.

"I want you to be happy."

"Then remember I'm here." She told him.

"What?" He pulled back and looked at her like she was insane.

"You only remember I'm here when you think I'm about to leave." It wasn't an accusation. It was a statement of fact that he couldn't argue with. He took her for granted. "I want to be with you. That's why I'm here. Don't forget that." Her threatening tone was back and he almost relished it. "Or I'll have to remind you."

He laughed a little and she pinched him hard.

"Ow!"

"Oh poor baby." She teased, pressing her teeth to his neck.

"Fiona." He hissed, digging his nails carefully into her sides.

"Michael I love you." She told him sharply, her hands laying on either side of his breastbone and traced the hollow of his throat with both thumbs. "I do."

"You know I do too, don't you?" He breathed. "You know that just because I can't-." She nodded. "I'm scared." He confessed. "Those words scare the hell out of me. My father claimed to love my mother and he beat the crap out of her Fi. He said he loved us.."

"Shh." She slid her hands up his neck and cradled his head. "It's alright."

"But I do."

"I know." She kissed him. "I know you do."

…...

They wrapped up their first job the next day and he let Fiona choose the restaurant, laughing when she'd chose something in Bayshore, the most expensive neighborhood in Miami.

Michael pretended to be aghast when she ordered five bottles of the most expensive red wine, and pretended to wince when she knocked over two glasses trying to pour bottle number three.

"Sleep safe tonight America!" Jesse called to her from across the table. "Fiona's on the job."

He shook his head at her when he stood up from the table, running his fingers through the back of her hair.

"Don't break anything while I'm in the bathroom please. " Her eyes shone at him.

He whispered something to the band before he started back, the vocalist nodded enthusiastically as he collected the handful of bills.

_Forever can never be long enough for me  
Feel like I've had long enough with you  
Forget the world now we won't let them see  
But there's one thing left to do _

She was right. About not seeing her until she threatened to take herself from the picture. Or until some one threaten to take her out of it.

The picture with out her was something he'd faced before.

Leaving her the first time, something that he was still sometimes amazed he'd actually been able to do, had shown him that picture.

He had filed their moments as a _bonus_. Something he didn't deserve to have and he'd pretended to be thankful that he'd had it for as long as he had.

Like it was enough.

He was good at convincing. He was Michael Westen after all.

Now sweeping his eyes across tables at the restaurant, smiling at the way her head was tossed back, laughing at Sam, he knew he'd never have enough time with her.

_Now that the weight has lifted  
Love has surely shifted my way  
Marry Me  
Today and every day  
Marry Me_

He made his way back to them, grabbing her flailing hand mid gesture and tugging at her.

"They're playing our song." He told her, when she let herself be pulled against his chest.

"This is our song now?" She grinned. Her eyes glazed slightly from the wine she'd been drinking.

"Mm-Hmm." He backed her up to the small dance floor pressing her back keeping them molded together. "It was playing in the car when I asked."

"When you demanded." She corrected.

"When I pleaded." He gave her his most humbled look.

_If I ever get the nerve to say  
Hello in this cafe  
Say you will  
Mm-hmm  
Say you will  
Mm-hmm  
_

"Are you drunk?" She teased, kissing his chest at the edge of his shirt.

"Not as drunk as you." He countered.

"Celebration of a job well done." She smiled. "And to future jobs well done."

"Careful! You almost sound excited about working for the government.

"Pft." She blew her Cabernet breath into his nostrils and he chuckled again. "I love things that go boom. You've promised me lots of them."

"Lots." He nodded. "I'll let you blow up what ever you want when we end up in some third world crumbling mess."

"You say the sweetest things." She purred.

_Together can never be close enough for me  
Feel like I am close enough to you  
You wear white and I'll wear out the words I love  
And you're beautiful _

"You are." He said softly.

"What?" She wasn't listening to the words, she wasn't sure if she could focus on anything between his hands and the wine.

"Beautiful." He pressed his cheek to the side of her head. "And I do."

"You do?"

"Love you." He sighed, feeling her cheek twitch.

"Say it again." She whispered, pulling him tighter.

"I love you."

_Now that the wait is over  
And love and has finally shown her my way  
Marry me  
Today and every day  
Marry me_

"So, when I need to hear you say it all I need is a bottle of Alexander Valley?" She raised her eye brows and then pursed her lips. He smiled until his eyes crinkled, then nodded.

"I should order a case then." She pressed her head against his chest.

_If I ever get the nerve to say hello in this cafe  
Say you will  
Mm-hmm  
Say you will  
Mm-hmm _

"Remember the first time we met?" He asked her softly.

"When we _met_ or when you first started your surveillance of me?"

"Met." He growled in fake irritation, turning her a little quicker than she expected before yanking her back against him.

"You thought I was going to be a push over."

"I thought I would seduce you with my charm." He teased. "And I did."

"Of course you did." She mumbled.

_Promise me  
You'll always be  
Happy by my side  
I promise to  
Sing to you  
When all the music dies _

"I knew I was in trouble right away." He admitted.

"You still are." She snickered he nodded.

"I've never been sorry."

"Never?" She smirked until he shook his head and cupped her face.

"Never." He let his lips close over hers tasting the Alexander on her.

_And marry me  
Today and everyday  
Marry me  
If I ever get the nerve to say hello in this cafe  
Say you will  
_

"We got married." She snickered.

"It's been two weeks and you're just realizing that now?"

"Maybe." She exhaled. "Husband."

"I like that." He sighed. "Mrs. Westen."

"Westen." She said crisply. "Fiona Westen. American super spy."

He laughed at her before kissing her again.

"Get a room!" Sam yelled from their table.

"We have one thanks." Fiona shouted back as Michael drug her away from the dance floor.

_Mm-hmm  
Say you will  
Marry me  
Mm-hmm_

…...

"Good Morning, Sunshine." Jesse laughed as Fi stumbled out onto the hotel balcony and joined the rest of the team at the table.

"This better be good." Fiona grumbled, taking the spoonful of yogurt Michael wordlessly offered before Sam poured her a glass of orange juice.

"Dan Called." Her husband said calmly.

"New marching orders?" Sam raised an eyebrow.

"Was he impressed with our work?" Jesse sighed.

"Apparently." Michael looked slowly around the table.

"Mike. I'm not liking the whole short sentences theme you go going on here." Sam swallowed.

Westen grunted uncomfortably.

"Michael?" Fiona whispered.

"How's the leg, Jess?"

"I'm walking." Jesse told him warily. "I'd need a mean cover story. How long?"

"Four weeks."

"Four? We need four week researched covers for this?" Sam rubbed his face.

"What's going on?" Fiona turned her head from face to face, no one met her gaze."Michael?" Her husband reached out and laid his hand over hers.

"Sam." Michael set his eyes on his old friend. "Now's the time to decide if you're in or out."

"Do I get to know what I'm getting into if I'm in?" Sam grit his teeth when Michael shook his head slowly. "Of course not."

"I want you on this Sam." Westen whispered. "But I understand if you need out."

Sam looked at the table for a minute before rubbing his face with a sigh.

"I don't have anything else going on."

"Will someone please tell me what in the hell-?" Fiona raised her voice.

"We have a new mission." He told her blankly.


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay, Spent the last three days looking up info on line. I'm scared to write a mission story! Hope this cuts it.**

…...

"This is where we're going? As in one night there '_makes a hard man humble_?'" Sam grumbled, flipping through his folder. "Oh and I get to be the pervert? Why do I have to be the pervert?" Fiona opened her mouth and he quickly pointed at her. "Don't answer that!" She closed her jaw and looked at Micheal who sat calmly watching Sam panic. "You know how I said I had nothing better to do? It think something just came up."

"They're hanging this guy out to dry Sam. They're writing him off as a traitor." Michael said calmly.

"Maybe he is." Jesse sighed, turning the pages of his own information slowly. "There are a whole lot of problems with his stories."

"He might be." Michael shrugged. "If that's true than we have bigger problems. This terror cell is no joke. Jemaah Islamiah is an up and coming player in the 'Death to America' club. If they're recruiting on the Burmese border.."

"When your targets are living in a refugee camp you don't have to offer them much to get them on your team." Fiona whispered.

"Why does this guy look so familiar?" Sam asked, still squinting at the picture."

"His names Harry Kim. We worked with him. He was our contact guy in Moscow for the thing with Alvang."

Michael looked at Axe. The older man rubbed his face before looking up.

"The young guy? He had a family."

"Wife. Three kids. Youngest is ten." Jesse read.

"He'd just had that baby. Kept showing us all her picture." The old seal squinted as he remembered.

"Savannah." Sam and Michael said at once.

"Dan knows him pretty well. Called him a friend." Westen added, Axe's eyes slipped shut before huffing

"I'm gonna need a clothing budget. I don't have any Western pervert attire." Sam collected his information, giving the group one last glare.

"You got it buddy." Michael whispered to him before he walked away.

"Looks like I gotta get going here pretty quick." Jesse sighed.

"He's really got to go alone?" Fiona worried, slipping her arm through Michael's and reading his file over his shoulder.

"He'll be fine." Her husband whispered.

"It's okay Fi. I gotta set this up." Jesse's eyes roamed the file. He liked what he saw. This was spy work. This was not protecting information from the likes of guys like Vaughn, or Mike for that matter. He smirked and looked at his friend. Michael smiled back like he could read his mind.

"Lucy Chen had an associate arranged a meet for you. They're excited about the prospect of American Securities. Especially one on the 'outs' with the American government." Jesse watched Westen's hand move in soft strokes across Fiona's back, a sure sign she was tense. He tried not to be overly smug that she was that worried about him. Those days were gone.

"You guys'll be joining me in a week or so?" He raised an eye at Fiona who quickly went back to her own file before nodding.

"Who the hell vacations in Bangkok?" Fiona snorted, already questioning her own cover.

"A woman who is extremely tolerant of her workaholic husband." Micheal grinned at her and the smugness left Porter in a rush as her eyes flashed up at Mike with adoration.

"Lucky man." She purred, he nodded back with wide eyes before pressing his lips to hers.

"You two make me a little sick, I'm not gonna lie." Jesse exhaled slowly, reaching across his body to retrieve the small cane he was using. "I'm gonna go try to look like a military reject."

"Call me." Westen muttered after him, his eyes never leaving his wife.

"Sure thing."

…...

"And you're sure you'll be able to call? Don't tell me you will and then never call."

"We should be able to Mom. If not Sam can." Michael leaned forward and shoved a few more things in his mother's bag. "You just enjoy Nate." He raised his eyebrows. "Take Trudy shopping."

"For god sakes Michael the woman's name is Ruby!" She scolded.

"The woman's name is Ruth." Fiona added, the words slipping through tight lips. Michael smirked at her.

"What ever!" Madelyn growled, grabbing a pack of cigaretts and dropping them on top of Michael's duffle bag.

"Mom you know you can't take those." He huffed.

"It's bad enough you're making me take your stupid military crap bag but now you want to tell me how to pack too?"

"We need to look like tourists." Fiona reminded, smoothing her hand over Madelyn's lugage. "Not.. _spies_." Michael smiled at the way she whispered the word. "Tourists have lugage, And Ruth doesn't want you smoking around her. She's pregnant." Fiona took the box out of the bag.

"I wasn't going to smoke _around_ her." Maddy put it back in.

"You heard what Nate said, she doesn't even want the smell in the house. It makes her feel sick." Fiona looked at her blankly, covering the box with her hand.

"That's why I'm staying in a hotel!" Her husband's mother told her a little more firmly. "You're not going to be this big of a pain in the ass when you're pregnant are you, Dear?" Fi's eyes widened and she withdrew her hand from the cigarettes. Maddy gave her a victorious smirk. "That's what I thought."

"Mom, save some of that Mother in law charm for Judy."

"Rudy! Maddy snapped.

"Ruth.." Fiona sang, moving her self back out of the room.

"Lay off the baby stuff with her." Michael muttered.

"What's wrong? Her biological clock ticking?"

"No." He told her firmly looking back towards the hall. "I just don't want her getting all worked up about it"

"Fiona?" Madelyn rolled her eyes at him. "Have you met her?"

"You really hurt her feelings before. With all that unfit to be a parent stuff."

"She was hurt that I didn't see children in you future?" Maddy snickered. "You really think that's what Fiona wants?"

"I think she'd at least like the option. I took that away from her." Michael looked back at the suitcase, fussing with the zipper to avoid the look he knew would be on her mothers face. "Sometimes I think it's still hard for her."

Madelyn waited, watching her son swallow hard.

"That we're never going to have a normal life, with the kids and the picket fence or what ever. She's about five minutes away from wanting a divorce, on a good day.." He looked back at her, his expression it's usual charming stare, not revealing anything. "So do me a favor and don't remind her what she's giving up."

He turned back to the bags and started grouping them together. His mother waited, her eyes soft and thoughtful.

"Michael." She said finally, unsurprised when he didn't look up. "Fiona proved to you she'd sooner die with you than live without you. Remember that?"

"I remember." He whispered softly.

"Then quit dwelling on what you can't give her and focus on what you already do." He glanced up at her and she looked at him hard. "Because whatever it is, it's enough for her. _You_ are enough for her." Maddy walked closer, cuffing his cheek lightly. "You're enough for me too."

"Madelyn come help me pick out which wedding photos to take with us!" Fi called. "I have to weed Sam and Jesse out of this little album."

"I'm coming Sweetheart." She called back.

"Thanks Ma." He whispered as she kissed him lightly before lugging her own bag into the living room.

…...

Jesse winced again at his 'temporary tattoo.' It still surprised him every time he saw it. They guy Sam took him to said it would last a year. Tops. He wasn't so sure. It sure looked real. He pulled his wife beater back on and started out into the small living area out side the latrine.

"Saunders." One of the younger guys leaned back in his chair his eyes set on Jesse.

"Yeah." He kept his eyes trained on him for a little longer then necessary.

"You're a Marine?"

"Was once." He snorted, brushing his hands over the tat. "Not anymore. That's what the forget to tell your drunk ass before they drag you to the tattoo parlor. Inks permanent. The job they can take away at any minute."

"You get DD'd?" The boy asked, his eyebrows raising, Jesse nodded.

"Almost killed a guy in a bar fight. I mean. They teach you how to do it and then expect you not to just cause some white ass weekend warrior out ranks you?" Jesse snorted, dropping into a chair. "Think it's because I'm Muslim. They're rooting us all out you know? Cause a few of us pulled one over on the crack pot team of airport security personnel we all gotta be on the back of Bush's playing cards now right?"

The kid looked vaguely sick before he straightened up a little in the chair.

"Amen." The guy at the desk muttered. _Santi_, Jesse took note. The guy was on the watch list he'd compiled since he'd been there. If anyone was looking to recruit, Jesse had his finger on him.

"Yeah.. Well." The kid looked at Jesse again, examining the tattoo before Jesse pulled his shirt back on. It did it's job, he decided, he just hoped it would come off as easy as Sam's guy claimed it would.

…...

"Hey there." Fiona made a face as the man leaned in further, leering at her. "How you doing little lady?"

She eyed him, his bloodshot rims and mis-buttoned top made her wonder just how far under his cover he'd managed to go.

"Do I know you?" She asked in annoyance.

"Do you want to?" He lifted an eyebrow before bringing his beer to his lips again.

"Not really no." She stepped back a little.

"Our rooms are right by each other." He muttered. "Easy access." The woman beside Fiona scoffed loudly, Fi gave her a quick glance.

"Is he bothering you?" She whispered, Fiona tried to look like she felt threatened.

"Do you want me to get my husband?" She asked, faking a false boldness.

"Yeah. I'll talk to your husband where is he?" The stranger puffed up his chest. "Some guy, left you all alone at the pool?"

"One call and he'll be down here." Fiona threatened.

"I'm leaving I'm leaving." He muttered, walking back towards the lobby. Fiona exhaled loudly and leaned back against her chair.

"Are you okay?" The woman asked leaning forward and touching her arm.

"Yes." She shook her head slowly. "You know when my husband suggested Bangkok the first thing I thought of was all those creeps that come over here to have sex with little children!"

"It's sad isn't it?" The woman shook her head. "I mean really."

Fiona looked towards the bar just in time to see Michael looking back.

"Oh my husband's back." She stood up quickly and hurried across the pool deck to him. Michael stretched his arm out and gathered her in with fake concern. "Sam needs to talk to you." She whispered as he pulled her close.

"Maybe _he_ has something." Michael sighed.

"Nothing from your meeting?"

"No. If they know what happened to him I can't figure it out." He pressed his lips into her hair line.

"Let's go upstairs." She hugged him closer. "Look pissed, the woman next to me heard us."

Michael nodded, putting his arm protectivly around her as they pulled apart and headed for the hotel. Fiona's new friend smiled sheepishly, as she gave her a little wave as Michael lugged her away.

…...

"Sam." Michael called, tossing the door between the rooms open unceremoniously.

"I think I got something Mikey."

"You need to shower." Fiona winced. "You look disgusting."

"Well I'm supposed to be disgusting." Sam gave her a dirty look. "A guy I talked to today.." He winced. "About things that are going to keep me up at night for the rest of my life? Said his 'buisness associate' might know about Harry. He said he keeps.. good records.." Sam made a face. "I think Fi's right I feel like I need a shower right now."

"I'm sorry Sam." Michael shook his head. "A few more days and we can get the hell away from here for a while."

"You think the borders going to be better?" He raised an eyebrow.

"I don't know." He huffed, dropping onto the small couch. Fiona opened the mini fridge and brought him a yogurt. "I'm starting to think this guy really did go bad."

"Damn it." Sam shook his head. "That's not what I want to hear Mikey."

"There's no sign of him or foul play." Michael rolled his eyes. "We'll see what we get from your guy, but if we can't find a lead, it's time to go to plan B."

"I'll try to get a message through to Jesse. See if he's on to anything down there." Axe sighed. "After my shower." He called before closing both doors behind him.

Fiona did the lock on their side before dropping beside her husband and laying her head on his arm.

"When we get to the border can I blow something up?" She asked absently, looking up at him with her big eyes. He stopped and stared at her with the spoon dangling from his lips before rolling his eyes. She blinked and he started to laugh.

She laughed too


	3. Chapter 3

**Two words.. writers block.. It usually takes me about two hours to crank out a chapter.. this took me four days.. grrr..**

**...**

"Hey there you are. How was your trip?" Michael opened his mouth to respond before a ripple of giggles rang through the air. He raised an eyebrow before leaning in to get a better look at Sam's motel room. Five little girls sat on his bed watching American cartoons from the 1970's laughing in unison and passing sodas to each other. He looked up a Sam.

"It's taking the guys from World Health a little longer to get here then I though." He shrugged.

"They let you take them from the brothel alone?" Michael asked, as Sam flopped a piece of licorice at him. Westen shook his head.

"Nah, Fi's got the Madam handcuffed to the sink in your bathroom and the Goon's drugged out of his mind in the trunk of my rental."

"Lovely." Michael sighed, closing his eyes as the group of girls giggled as Jerry smacked Tom on the head. "And my wife is..?"

"Room six." He pointed to the left. "She's all worked up Mike."

"I'm sure." Westen sniffed, looking back at the children before making his way down to room six. He knocked four times. She knocked back six. He knocked back two and she swung the door open and backed away. "Hey."

"Sam started a Day Care while you were gone. Did you see it?" She sang.

"What was he supposed to do Fi? He'd been poking around the brothel for days, they were getting suspicious." Michael pealed off his coat, looking around at the gross interior of the motel. "It was time for him to complete a transaction."

"He _bought_ five children today." Fi huffed. "I have a baby seller cuffed to my sink." She tossed her arm towards the bathroom, he grabbed it and pulled her into his chest.

"The W.H.O. will be here any minute to gather them all up." He smiled at her fondly.

"I haven't gotten to blow anything up yet and this motel smells like elephants." She sighed laying her ear against his breast pocket.

"It's not the Sukhothai is it?" He teased, pulling her tighter.

"It was lovely there Michael." She murmured.

"Not C-4 friendly though." He reminded her.

"Again.. how many things have I blown up since arriving in Thailand?" She tilted her head back, lifting an arm and making a zero with her finger and thumb.

"Soon." Michael promised with more than a little sarcastic patronization. "At the border."

"When do we leave for the border?" She smiled, her eyes wide.

"As soon as the kids get picked up from Uncle Sam's Day Care?" Westen pointed his head towards the other room. "We can go over our covers and get going tomorrow afternoon."

…...

"I don't know about these new covers Mike." Sam muttered rubbing his head with a towel. "It's not ever day you go from being a pervert to a missionary."

"Yeah. Cause there's no such thing as a perverted missionary." Fiona muttered, her hands weaving through her hair as she braided. Michael smiled at her.

"I'll have you know that Pastor Chuck is a true man of the cloth. And because of that he'll forgive you for your doubt." Sam huffed, straightening his collar. "And that's no way to talk to your father!"

Fiona rolled her eyes turning to look at Michael.

"Why do I have to be the preacher's daughter again?" She pouted.

"Sure. She now she whines. I've been a kiddy rapist all week and now I'm playing a man of the cloth fifteen years older than I actually am." He held up the hair dye shaking the box. "You get to play a sweet innocent virgin half your actual age-."

"Half! How old do you think I am?" She screeched.

"How old do you think I am!"

"Guys! I know both of your _actual _ages!" Michael's voice rose above them as they quieted. "Would you like me to share?"

"You wouldn't dare." Fiona hissed, her eyes burning into him. He raised his eyebrows at her threateningly.

Sam's hands rose and he pressed his palms toward his friend in surrender.

"Lets get back to work here shall we?" He sighed like a tolerant mother, setting is eyes on his wife. "This is going to be tough for you. I realize that-."

"For me!" Fiona rolled her eyes, chucking her thumb back at Sam. "Last time I checked Baptist Preachers didn't drink like fish-."

"Hey-. I am a professonal lady, I don't-."

"What the hell is going on?" Michael looked between them. "Did something happen while I was in Bangkok?" Sam and Fiona looked at each other in mild confusion. "You guys haven't been at each other like this in years."

"Like what?" Fi whispered looking from Sam to her husband. He looked at Sam.

"I.. don't know what.." Sam shook his head slowly.

"You've been bickering at each other all day."

"What else are we supposed to do?" Fiona asked, quirking her face up. Sam shrugged in agreement.

"You're bored?" Westen snorted in annoyance.

Sam and Fi exchanged nods before watching Michael blink hard before turning towards the door.

"I'll be in our room!" He huffed closing the door behind himself.

"Touchy." Sam muttered, looking at Fiona. "Do I look dignified?"

"You look like a preacher." Fiona admitted before grinning. "What about me?"

"You, my child, don't look like a virgin." He laughed. Fiona's smile widened.

…...

"You and Sam done entertaining each other?" Michael whispered, setting down his copy of the information Jesse had sent.

"You sound jealous." She pouted, crawling across the bed to him. "You want me to argue with you for a while?" Michael grinned reaching towards her and pressing his lips to hers.

"I like your hair like this." He told her, tilting his head to the side. She wrinkled her nose. "It's different. Wholesome. "

"Wholesome?" She ground her hips against him. "Boy did you marry the wrong woman."

"I didn't say I wanted you to _be_ wholesome." He mumbled rising his own pelvis up to hers.

"You like this as much as the pig tails?" She asked, rubbing her hands over his chest before dipping down to kiss his neck. "I remember how much you liked the pig tails."

"Ah.. yeah I remember the pig tails.." He grunted as she worked her hands down to his pajama pants and cupped his penis firmly. He unbuttoned the first couple of buttons on her blouse, his grip tightening as she increased the pressure. "That's.. I liked the pig tails." He ground out, his backside bucking off of the bed.

He pulled his fingers away from her outfit, fearing he'd rip one of the few modest shirts she'd gotten for the cover. She grinned at him, finishing off the buttons and carefully leaning over to set it over the back of a nearby chair. Michael stroked the curve of her body as she did before bringing his lips forward to her nipples, carefully raking his teeth over them before sucking them each into little points while Fi wiggled her hand beneath his pants and gasped him fully. Michael jumped slightly, earning him a wide toothy smile from his wife.

"So tense." She purred, crawling backwards until she was at his navel. "Relax Michael." She lowered her mouth to his abs, licking them slowly before moving her head down a little further. "I'm not going to bite." She licked her lips, one eyebrow quirking higher than the other. "Promise."

He let his head drop back as she took him in, his fingers almost instinctively going to her hair, fumbling against the braid before dropping away in frustration.

"This things are like Chinese handcuffs."

She giggled a little, her throat humming against his body. He hissed, his spine straightening as his hands drop back against her hair, before his fists clenched in frustration. She bobbed her head up again before lifting her face to him.

"For God sakes Michael, take it out if it bothers you that mu-."

He used her distraction grabbing at her shoulders and pulling her face to his. She sucked in a breath of surprise before he sealed his mouth over her perfect lips hungrily.

Michael reached for the button of Fiona's jeans and peeled them down to her knees leaving her to fight out of them while he yanked at the small rubber band holding her hair to her head. She smiled at the sigh of relief he gave once he could run his fingers through it again.

He let one hand drop away, pulling her body close before sliding his thumb in between them until her back was arching at the perfect angel.

"Michael." She arched and squirmed, her hands gripping his shoulders with sudden force. He waited until her breath became spastic and her almost imperceptible cries came faster. "Please." She whimpered just before he angled himself inside of her with gentle force. "Oh."

He wound her hair in his hands, meeting her hips with his own. She braced herself with his shoulders as he decreased their pace. He went back to her clit, carefully moving in slow circles while she writhed. She leaned against his chest for a moment her muscles contracting against him.

He felt the tremble move through her kissing her brow, her temple, her hair line.

She watched his face, the vague grimace of restraint made her smile, before she pressed her hips to his, urdging him to start again.

Michael met her hips with his, rocking slowly.

"Come on Michael give it up." She commanded softly against his ear.

He shook his head at her and her eyes flashed.

"Could be weeks before we can do this again.." He reminded her.

Fiona seemed to consider that for a moment before she pushed him back against the mattress, his arms instinctively going to her hips as she flexed them, pushing forcefully up and down from his body.

"You like this?" She taunted. "You like it when I do this?" He watched her back arch, gathering her gluts into his palms to sync with her pace. He watched her breasts rise and fall as she panted. "I know what you really want.." Her voice was a shaky whisper as her head tossed forward, splaying her hair across his chest. She was already close again."What do you really-?" Her body tensed as she ground out the rest of the taunt. "-want Michael?"

She swore in Gaelic as she climaxed again, and that was all it took. Something so signature Fiona made him snap. He rolled her over, grasping her thigh firmly enough to angel it and hold it in place as he pressed himself deeply into her.

"That's it." She coaxed, he was done for and she new it. "This is what you want." She ran her nails over his flesh and cried out against his shoulder. "That's it."

Her fingers wove behind his neck as he tried to stifle a yell. His body shook violently above her and she lifted her other leg and wrapped around him tightly as he lowered his sweaty chest to hers.

"I was wrong." He told her. "_This_ is what I'm made for."

Her brow furrowed as she tried to understand, before her mind flashed to the loft years ago, wooden salad bowls and harsh words. Her lips parted as his eyes reached hers.

"Both of us." He panted. "For this."

"This?" She grinned pressing her pelvis forward, he grinned back.

"You and me." He clarified, before tilting his head to his shoulder in an awkward backwards shrug. "This too."

Her lips stretched, parting across her teeth in a way that made her look like more the young woman he'd met in Ireland years ago.


	4. Chapter 4

**I remember now why I never write stories about missions.. or cases.. or anything but relationships.. it's too hard! Anyway.. I do apologize for the crazy delays in production.. :) I have a feeling the new season will start before this thing ends...**

**

* * *

**

"New Guy!" Jesse sat up, rubbing his eyes before yawning.

"Yeah?"

"New missionary group, wants _personal security_." The supervisor smirked with a roll of his eyes. "You're going to stay in their lodge with them."

"Seriously?"

"The bible beater has a hot little piece of ass for a daughter. I think he's afraid the natives'll carry her off into the night."

"Why me?"

"Guy's a real goody goody.. I figure I'd throw him one of Allah's best." The guy smirked.

"Lucky me." Jesse muttered.

"Put on a happy face Saunders, lets go meet your new church group." Jesse huffed, putting on his boots and tromping after the man.

"Oh here we go." One of the top directors of the Burma refugee rescue group turned, giving him a once over. "Who's this Officer Thompson?"

"This is Jamal Saunders, former US Military." He clapped Jesse on the arm and he shot the man a dirty look. "Nothing'll get past him."

"Great. Mr. Saunders, this is Pastor Finley, his daughter Elizabeth and Associate Pastor Adam Cross." Jesse nodded at each of them. "If you want to gather a bag together, Officer Thompson can bring you to H house."

Jesse watched his team retreat back toward the lodges, admiring Fiona's tight figure. It wasn't the first time, but he'd never done it with this amount of ridiculous indiscretion.

"Wow." Saunders snorted. "She is.."

"I'm telling you." Thompson snorted. "I might drag her off into the woods myself." He walked a few paces ahead of him and Jesse scowled.

…...

"Let him try." Fiona snorted flippantly from her spot on the sofa.

Mike and Jesse exchanged glances.

"You think he's a threat?" Mike whispered, ignoring the indignant rustle of his wife's magazine and exasperated

"I think they're all a threat." Jesse muttered.

"I think Fiona can handle herself." Sam said loudly. "I think we need to talk about Harry Kim."

"Thank you, Sam." Fi sniffed, turning until she was leaning over the back of the couch on her elbows. "You think he was in _cahoots_?"

"I don't have any proof at all," Jesse shook his head. "but, I gotta tell you somethings going on here. One of the guys.. Samir Santi, I'm sure if he isn't in the Jemaah Islamiah he's a sympathizer. If Kim was here and he figured them out. They'd kill him."

"Or.." Sam sighed. "If he was dirty.. Santi would know what happened to him."

"You have an in with him Jess?" Michael sighed loudly.

"I've been working it, but he's not biting." Porter crossed the room, opening the cooler with a grin. He pulled out a mixed berry yogurt in triumph. "God I've missed you guys! No beer Sam?"

"Baptist Minister." Sam whined, tugging at the collar.

"Maybe it's time you two had a common enemy?" Mike's eyebrows rose, as he and Jesse looked at Sam.

"The enemy of my enemy is my friend." Fiona beamed.

"Exactly." Michael drew out the word, letting his head bob towards her with satirical pride. She tried to hide her smile.

…...

"Hey.. big shot.. how does the other half live?" Jimmy Brooks leaned back in his chair when Jesse stomped back into the security barracks.

"This guys a piece of work. Reading from the bible, talking about Jesus, he never stops." Jesse huffed dropping onto his bunk. Santi grunted.

"Sounds like a fun guy." Jimmy rolled his eyes.

"I just.." Jesse looked around the room, meeting eyes with each of the men. "He's the guy that makes you want to-." He stopped, his eyes moving from Santi to the ceiling."I don't know."

"How'd you get sprung?"

"They're in the mission house. I guess they don't feel the need to have Princess guarded while she's reading to homeless children. I wonder if they know their Muslim?" Jesse snorted, watching Brooks roll his eyes before heading out the door to the mess hall. Santi sat motionless. "I wish there was a secret Jihad group sitting around out there. I'd like to see them take the whole bunch of them."

"That could be arranged." The man said solemnly, turning his face back towards Jesse with a deadpan expression stuck to it. Jesse blinked back at him, with one slim eyebrow arching.

…...

"He took the bait." Jesse whispered, making his way through the door. He's eyes fell on Fiona's open bag. "Shit Fi what if it wasn't me?"

She looked down at the three assault rifles she was stuffing into it.

"Then I guess I'd be trying to figure out how to hide a body right now." She shrugged a shoulder. "Not the first time."

"Fiona play nice." Michael called walking back into the room in his business suite. "How'd it go?"

"He took the bait." Porter repeated. "I think he's calling someone in. What's going on here?" He gestured from Fi's arsenal to Michael's wardrobe.

"Michael got a call on the satellite phone from a Bangkok asset. He says he has new information on Kim." She sighed. "We are going to meet him."

"You need a sniper rifle and two semi's for a business lunch?"

"Can't be too careful." She hummed.

"Where's Sam?"

"Getting us a car. The two of you are going to have to figure out the Santi thing." He looked at Jesse. "Keep your eyes open. These guys are actual terrorists, not just disgruntled Arabic security guards."

"You leave any fire power for us Mrs. Westen?"

"Sam has my 700 and his AICS." She rolled her eyes. " And I'm pretty sure he wouldn't have left Bangkok without his Winchester. You need more?"

"No. No the Remington's are good." Porter put up his hands.

"Try not to start a war until we get back alright." Michael widened his eyes at them both.

The back door opened and Jesse leaned over enough to see Sam lumbering through.

"I got a car Mikey if you can call it that." He reached out the keys and dropped them into Westen's hand. "Beat to hell, black hatchback. I left it about a mile up the dirt road."

"Thanks Sam." He sighed.

"I've been trying to decide on an appropriate curfew for Princess here." He looked between the two of them, his thumb chucked towards Fiona. "How long after you guys are gone do I start to panic?"

"We'll be fine Sam." Michael smirked. Axe continued to stare at him expectantly. "Shouldn't take more than two hours."

"These things are hit and miss out there." He decided, handing Fiona one of the satellite phones.

"If I can't get you on this after three hours, we're coming after you."

"We'll be back Sam."

…...

Fiona leaned forward again, trying to get a better angel with her rifle. She pushed her face against he scope at the exact moment it happened.

What exactly happened she wasn't sure, but she watched the way Michael's eyes widened as the man spun into him, then flattened against he wall. She pointed her rifle at the ground and fired. That was enough to gain the attention of her husband's assailant who ran off into the dirt.

Michael remained frozen against the building, his eyes sweeping from side to side as she jumped down from her perch and frantically pulled the car down the hill.

The hatchback lurched as she yanked it into parck and flung herself out onto the dirt and rushed to his side.

"Didn't see that coming." He groaned.

"Let me see."

"I'm fine." He muttered instinctively, leaning into her more than he realized.

"Of course you are." She breathed, knowing it was more habitual than an actual dismissal. She tugged his shirt from his pants and started unbuttoning it. "I need to see." She gasped and he grunted when she finally found the source of all the blood seeping through is shirt, pressing her palm firmly against it. "Oh God."

"I'm fine." Micheal said again. His hand became heavier against his shoulder and his knees started to buckle. She pushed him further against the wall, trying to slow his decent with her small body. She winced as his back scraped against the bricks as he sagged to the ground. She pushed her hand more firmly against his wound to keep up with his body, watching the blood seep from between her fingers.

"Yes." She told him urgently, holding his eyes tight with hers. "You're going to be fine. Or I'm going t-." Her voice broke and he found himself ridiculously snickering at her. She bit her lip watching his mouth gulp in a breath. She slowed her own breathing, exaggerating even inhalations for him. He followed her lead.

"Fi." His unsteady gasps pushed her name from his lips. He wanted to tell her his lung was punctured. He wanted to remind her what to do. She looked back and forth,

"I know." She did, she could feel the uneven pull of his chest. "But you only need one remember?"

"You'll need-." He wheezed. She shook her head.

"I know." She said quickly. "Just breathe." She knew what needed to be done and so would Sam. His knees gave way and his butt dropped to the ground. She stopped crouching and settled her thighs over his. "Where the hell is-?" She looked away before Michael's hand jumped from her shoulder and turned her face back to his. She inhaled sharply before swallowing hard. "Okay. Okay." She whispered calmly, despite her racing heart and the way his fingers were trembling against her jaw. Her free hand fumbled for the satellite phone.

Her eyes bounced from his face to the phone as she dialed.

"Sam?" She yelled into it when it crackled. "Sam?" She shook her head, dropping the phone beside her. "Damn it!" She looked at Michael. "You have to get up." She told him holding his eyes as he breathlessly choked out a pain filled cry as he pulled back up the wall. "That's it."

Fiona kept the pressure on the wound until he was in car, grabbing a piece of clothing from the floor of the car. He took it from her before she slid her hand away and pressed his in it's place.

His eyes rolled as he grimaced and she pulled the lever and reclined the seat before shutting the door and running around to the drivers side.

…...


	5. Chapter 5

**I think I got this now. Inspiration is such a fickle thing.. had no idea where i was going and then.. like a big light bulb appearing over my head...**

It was a _feeling_. Years of running back up for Mike and Fi, left him with an odd sense that something was off. Why had this guy from Bangkok suddenly called with information now?

It hadn't been two hours yet, but Sam Axe was ready to send out search party. He called the sat. phone again, waiting for Fiona to answer. She didn't, he growled at the thing before tossing it onto the bed, jumping slightly when it rang.

"Fiona?"

"Sam!" Her voice was more panicked then his.

"What happened?" He asked quickly.

"Michael's been hurt. It's bad. We're back where you left the car. I don't know what to-."

"I'm coming right now." He told her quickly grabbing his medical supplies and rushing out the back door. Sam retraced the path he'd taken earlier, cursing himself for being ten years away from his eight minute mile days. He caught sight of the car and sped up a little.

Fiona sat on the ledge between the door and the seat, pressing a blood soaked cloth to Michael's side.

"He punctured a lung." She reported, pushing her hair from her face, bloody streaks replacing the tears there. "And somethings bleeding Sam."

"How bad?" Axe asked unzipping the bag. Fi pulled a dripping blood red hand from the cloth and held it up to him. "Jesus."

Fiona moved back and Sam looked at the mess.

"Fi I can't-." He shook his head. "Get the biggest gauge needle we have and a 60cc syringe." She rummaged through the bag. "I can aspirate the lung but I can't repair a lacerated liver or spleen or what ever this is." He reached back and grabbed a bottle of betadine and started squirting. "Okay.. needle." He ran his hands along Michael's ribs until he found the right spot. "Hold him down."

He was out of it, but nothing can bring a man to consciousness faster than a needle jammed between his ribs.

"Got him." Fiona grunted, wedging herself between Michael and the dash. Sam swung back his arm, aimed for the right spot and prayed.

Fiona squeaked, pressing all her weight forward as her husbands body rose off of the seat. His eyes flipped open as he gasped. Sam pull popped the stopper off the syringe, cringing at the steady flow of red beneath it.

"Shh.. Shh.. It's okay." Fiona ordered, bringing her face close to Michael's. "It's Sam.. It's just Sam."

"Mother of God." Axe whispered, grabbing a handful of packing gauze and stuffing them into the tear in his best friend's side. Westen growled, turning his head into Fiona's shoulder, she pressed her chin to it. Her hands still shaking in an attempt to keep him pinned beneath her. "Fiona we need to get him to some one that can stop this bleeding."

"The mission has a doctor at Ma Ra Ma Luang, about an hour north." She whispered, helping Sam move Michael upright so he could wrap the bandage around him.

"An hour." He looked at his patient before looking back at his supplies. He pulled out what he needed. "We'll have to get a message to Jesse. You drive."

"Me?"

"Yeah. You're AB blood type isn't going to buy us an hour." He announced, sliding the IV in Micheal's arm before doing the same to his own. "I've been told not to donate and drive." He folded his large body awkwardly into the rear of the hatch back. "Let's hope I've got enough O- for both of us, Brother."

…...

When they weren't back at the mission for dinner Jesse started to worry. When Sam wasn't at the lodge he nearly lost his mind. Nothing like being abandoned along the Burmese border. He wandered into Sam's room to look around for a clue and that's where he found it.

It wasn't the the random note saying 'emergency went to Ma Ru Ma Luang' that alarmed him as much as the fact it was Fiona's scribble in marker on the back of a sterile gauze wrapper. What really made him feel sick to his stomach was the bloody finger prints on the the edge, and the smear of dry blood that had rubbed off her hand as she wrote it.

He wracked his brain, wondering if he was supposed to stay here? Protect his cover? Or get to Ma Ru Ma Luang as fast as he could?

He looked again at Fiona's blood stained message before making up his mind. He loaded up what few things they had in the lodge, tossing the remains of Fiona's closet arsenal before searching under Sam's bed for his Winchester. Finding nothing, he briefly considered leaving without it. Sam would kick his ass, he decided. He'd had that damn rifle forever. Porter tossed his head back and sighed, before catching sight of the perfect outline of a model seventy laying flat on the large plastic cover of the florescent light.

He took inventory again, reminding himself what Fiona had taken. He knew that Michael had Fi's H&K USP, normal people have pictures, a wedding ring.. Michael Westen carried his wife's handgun.

Satisfied, Jesse zipped up the three bags and headed back towards the mission garage. He'd been given a tour on his first day. He knew tucked in the far corner was a beat up army style jeep. He just hoped the old thing would start.

It did, and with enough bang to plow through the back of the prefabricated building and up to the dirt road to Ma Ru Ma Luang. He just hoped everyone lived long enough to greet him there.

…...

Fiona was sprawled out upside down on her husbands bed with her feet unceremoniously planted at his armpit. She snorted, her mouth falling slightly open, Michael absently squeezed the pad of her foot with his thumb and forefinger before sighing.

"You two are ridiculous." Sam shook his head, realizing too late he was still slightly woozy.

"What?" Michael asked, tilting his chin back towards his friend.

"Two hours ago you were a bloody mess and she was a basket case. Now she's snoring like a drunken sailor and your bored." He huffed. Westen smiled, maybe it was a little ridiculous.

"You'd think with all the blood you gave me I'd have settled down a little." He agreed. "She hasn't been sleeping." He nodded at his wife. "All those air conditioned four star nights in Bangkok spoiled her."

Sam rolled his eyes and started to reply that she'd been spoiled long ago when his eyes caught sight of a tiny Burmese nurse at the door.

"There is a man." She said in her own shaky English. Michael and Sam exchanged worried looks before Axe sat up and reached beneath the bed sheet for Fiona's hand gun.

"Fi." Michael whispered loudly, pushing against her with his leg. She twitched before her eyes flashed open and she fumbled for her Walther.

"Nobody shoot it's just me." Jesse called calmly making his way into the room palms facing up. The woman looked between the four of them nervously before Sam gave an exaggerated smile and they guns all began to disappear again. "What the hell happened?"

"I think we found out what happened to Harry Kim." Fiona whispered sleepily, turning her body around and leaning back against Michael's shoulder.

"One of his business associates told me he asked too many questions." Michael announced, yanking back the sheet and revealing his fresh bandage. "Apparently so did I."

"Shit." Jesse winced.

"Yeah." Michael agreed. "Not the way I wanted to spend my morning."

"Just be thankful that your liver laceration resolved it's self." Sam rolled his eyes. "I think I've seen more OR time then our doctor friend out there."

"We really didn't even need to come here. Sam was being modest." Fiona yawned closing her eyes, with the crisis averted she'd quickly fallen back to her usual malaise with the most recent trauma. Michael smirked at her.

"You okay?" Jesse asked pulling another chair into the circle and dropping into it.

"I'm fine." Michael waved away the concern.

"He will be, after two days _at least_ of bed rest.

"At the Sukhothai." Fiona injected without bothering to lift her eyelids.

"And five days at least before he does any active mission work."

"I'm fine Sam." Michael pouted.

"If your liver starts bleeding again you won't be. You lucked out Mike. Lets just roll with that shall we?"

"It's so easy to roll with things at the Sukhothai." Fiona moaned.

"So I finally get some Bangkok action?" Jesse grinned. Sam and Michael exchanged glances. "What?" He looked between the two of them. "I'm not going to Bangkok."

"Not yet." Sam grimaced.

"We were thinking if Santi thinks you killed a couple of missionaries.." Michael looked at him hopefully.

"He might take me to Jemaah Islamiah." Jesse lifted his eyebrows. "Then what? I take down the whole terror cell single handed?"

"No." Fiona whispered absently, curling into her husband's side. "I do. With a little something I'll have whipped up within the lovely surroundings of the Sukhothai hotel."

…...


	6. Chapter 6

**Let me tell you a secret. (maggie)…I don't really care about the mission either. I find them dreadfully boring.. it's more of a writing challenge for me right now. So there will never be a pure mission chapter from me.. always a little M/F drama! LOL thanks!**

Jesse looked down at Michael's bloody t-shirt in disgust before pulling it on over his head and reentering the barracks.

Jimmy Brooks sat up with a start.

"Saunders what the hell happened to you-." He stopped short looking at the blood. Samir Santi was looking too.

Jesse glanced nervously between the two.

"Nothing. Little accident." He said softly, hunching over the duffle bag and shoving in the things he'd left behind hours before.

"Little, you look like you just slaughtered a pig or som-."

"Go back to sleep Jimmy." Santi said quickly, sitting up in his bunk and studying Jesse. The younger man dropped cautiously back to his mattress.

"Jamal. He said slowly. "Come.." Jesse's back stiffened but he followed Samir outside, tossing his duffel bag a few feet and pacing away. "They were concerned when you and the missionaries did not return. "

"They should have been concerned." Jesse rocked slowly on his heels, pressing the butt his palm into his eyes. "He just wouldn't stop.. he wouldn't-."

"What did you do?" Samir asked softly, coming around and clasping Jesse's shoulders. "Tell me! What did you do?"

"I killed them." He whispered softly, casting a hollow glance up at the other man. "They'll find them by the morning." He shook his head. "I have to get out of here."

"Where will you go?"

"I don't know. I-." He looked around. "After what I have done-."

"I know people that will rejoice in what you have done." Santi nodded.

"You know people.." Jesse shook his head in confusion. "Like Al-Queda? Are you al-qu-.?"

"No. No. I am Jemaah Salafi." He shook his head frantically. "My people are in Puhket. You must go there. Tell Fatah what you have done. He will know what to do." He grabbed at Jesse's arm and scribbled an address before Jesse hurried off into the night.

…...

Jemaah Salafi!" Sam balked. "That's not even on a top ten of who's who in terrorist land. Abdul Fatah is small potatoes. We might as well be chasing the ROS. Seriously Fi it's not worth your C4."

"So what am I doing in Puhket?" Jesse's voice whined through the speaker phone.

"Don't listen to him Jesse." Michael rolled his eyes at the ceiling. "And don't approach them alone. Jesus Sam did you think the guy was going to give him Bin Laden's cell phone number or something?"

"Well you are Michael Westen." Fiona quipped from the table, he shot her a dirty look. "Do I make a bomb or not?"

"You make a bomb." Michael rolled his eyes. "Sam you go to the embassy and get permission to use Fi's bomb."

"Permission!" Fiona hissed.

"Yes. Permission." Michael sighed. "Jesse you find someplace to hang tight and do some surveillance. Stay low. Despite Sam's harassment these guys are a big deal okay?"

"What ever." Sam muttered, going back into his room through the connecting door.

"I'm as low as a man can get wearing his buddy's bloody undershirt."

"Yeah, you might wanna get yourself something else." Michael grinned.

"Already on it." He was in fact currently wrapping a fake bandage around his arm before going out to buy clothes. "How's your patient Fi?"

"He'll live." She called.

"I'm fine." Michael gave his robotic reply.

"He is actually being the model patient." Fiona mumbled, looking at him sideways. "Following orders to the T."

"That can't be a good sign."

"No, it can't be." She eyed him suspiciously before reaching out and feeling his forehead. He swatted her away playfully.

"It hurts okay!" Michael relented. "I haven't been in this much pain since _**someone**__ shot me in the chest!"_

Fi screwed up her mouth in an attempt not to smile before sitting on the edge of the bed.

"It was in the _shoulder,_ you big baby." Jesse sighed loudly.

"How'd you put it Fi? Inches from my tiny heart?" Fiona giggled at him and he winked back.

"Waah." Jesse grumbled.

"_Waah_ he says." Michael grumbled back.

"Enough of this. I'm going to the pool." Fiona called, standing up and sauntering to the door.

"The pool.." Jesse sighed again. "Next time I get to hang at the four star by the pool while someone else wears your bloody shirt."

"Next time." Michael smiled.

…...

"Hi." Fiona's eyes fell on Michael's as they blinked open. "How you doing?"

"I'm fine." He rubbed at his eyes. "How was the pool?"

"Overrated." She sighed, putting down her ingredients and moving from the table to the edge of the bed. "There were children there. Seriously? Who brings their children to Bangkok?" She laid her hand on his thigh.

"I don't know." He whispered, looking back at her fully stocked table. "Did Sam get permission for our bomb?"

"Yes. And it's_ my_ bomb." She told him defensively. "I'm going to make it and Sam is going to take it to Jesse. And I am going to take you to Bumrungrad Hospital for a CT scan."

"Fi I'm-."

"Yes.. fine, I know you told me. Incidentally you also told me that while bleeding to death in my arms." She looked at him smuggly. "You admitted to being in pain and you have suspiciously been the model patient. That alone should have tipped me off. You're going to Bumrungrad."

"Fin-." He closed his mouth. "See if I say fine you're going to call an ambulance or something aren't you?"

She smiled widely.

"Don't be silly, Michael. I've been waiting a long time to build a bomb. If you've made it this long bleeding internally you'll make it a little longer." She sighed, patting his knee before hurrying back over to the table.

…...

"Don't let this thing explode before I see his face." Sam whispered, zeroing in the scope of his rifle on Fiona's little package.

"I thought you said he was small potatoes." Jesse snorted, still breathing heavy from excaping the 'distraction' he'd created.

"He is. He's like a tater-tot." Sam teased. "But this is probably the closest I'm going to get to a terrorist of even this measly caliber. I want to be able to say I saw the eyes of _the man who Bin Laden sent a guy to talk to a guy, about sending a guy to talk to this guy, _right before he died."

Jesse rolled his eyes at him before grabbing a pair of binos.

"Knock Knock." Porter whispered, watching the men scurry back to the house after clearing up Fiona's 'diversionary explosive device'. Sam looked at the flashing red light on Fiona's big bomb as the flashes got closer and closer before wincing away at the flash of light.

"Mission accomplished." Sam said softly as he and Jesse watched pieces of house fall down around them. They looked at each other for a long moment before packing up their bag and disappearing into the crowd.

Sam slid into the rental car with a groan.

"I think I'm too old for this." He told Porter.

"Yeah well." Jesse sighed, looking out the window before opening his mouth again before Sam's phone rang. He pressed the steering wheel and patched the call through the call.

"Hey Fi. How's our boy?"

"He's got an infection." Fiona huffed. "I should have known. And the lung isn't working at full capacity either. His blood oxygen level was ninety Sam."

"Wonderful." Axe grunted, heading back towards the city. "It'll be okay."

"The did a minor surgical repair of his liver." She whispered seriously into the phone. "I want to go home."

"Fi. They'll give him some penicillin and some oxygen and he'll be fine." Sam reminded her. "Good as new."

"And what if we wouldn't have taken him? What if we were in Pakistan or Afghanistan and his lungs gave out? Or his liver failed?" She hissed. "I want to go home, Sam."

"Fiona.." Sam sighed.

"Don't tell me you don't, because I know you do." Her voice broke and he sighed harder. "This isn't worth it."

"Fiona we blew up a terrorist leader and half his cell today-." He argued weakly.

"And how is that more important than what we were doing in Miami?" She cried softly. "How is it more important that helping someone save their child or helping someone wrongly accused of murder? Why is this more important?"

"Fi.." Michael's lost voice silenced any reply Axe had in him. He pressed his lips together. "Fiona?"

"I'll see you when you get back Sam." She whispered before the line went dead. He turned to look at Jesse, taking a deep breath.

"She's right you know." Porter said slowly. Sam looked back at the road in front of them.

…...

Fiona turned slowly to face her husband, blinking the tears from her eyes.

"I'm sorry." She whispered. "I was-."

"Was that Sam?" He asked rubbing his face with his hand, wincing in annoyance. She exhaled slowly realizing he hadn't heard anything. She nodded, still chewing at the edge of her lip.

"How do you feel?" She asked, swiping under her eyes and moving closer.

"I'm going to be alright." He croaked, reaching out his hand to her. She took it, rubbing thumb against his wrist.

"I know. Because your wife is smarter than you." She forced a grin letting it quickly fade.

"Fi?" He asked quickly, tugging her closer.

"I'm just tired." She waved him off with her free hand. Michael scooted carefully to the left and tugged at her again.

"Is this when I'm suposed to tell you I notice you?" He smiled softly, she sniffed. "Because I do."

"How could you not?" Fiona sighed crawled onto the bed like a small child, huddling against his side.

"It's hardly the Sukhothai." He teased her, smoothing his hands over her hair.

"It'll do." She whispered, he trailed his hand down her back and up again until she fell asleep.

He frowned, swallowing hard before his eyes fell on the water pitcher of water on the rolling table. He moved it towards them with his foot. Michael shakily poured a cup before his eyes fell on a pice of paper. He blinked at the simple list in Fiona's swirly script.

…...

pros

_In Miami we never had to drive an hour for bad medical care_

_In Miami we never had to steal a crappy hatch back _

_In Miami we never had to buy people or pretend to have sex with children_

_In Miami nothing smells like elephants_

_In Miami I can wear my wedding ring if I want to_

_In Miami it's never more than a little too hot and some places have AC_

_In Miami there is easy access to yogurt, tuna and egg white omelets (and mojitos for sam)_

_In Miami Sam did not look as old and worn down (may just be the gray hair dye and lack of beer)_

_In Miami I never had to eat an insect_

_In Miami I could someday, maybe, give Nate's child a cousin_

_In Miami we made a difference to real people who had no where else to turn_

_In Miami there is Madelyn_

_In Miami I can sleep through the night_

cons

_In Miami Michael can't wait to leave_

_In Miami Michael feels useless_

_Michael needs me with him_

_Miami means nothing if Michael's not there with me _

…...

Michael folded the list a few times absently looking for a place to put it before slipping it beneath the pile of pillows under his head.

He sighed softly, pressing a kiss to her head. He squinted his eyes shut and tried to make his own list of pros and cons.


	7. Chapter 7

**I will be getting back to both Fi and Michael's list soon. Sam's hair was really bugging me.. and Fiona. :)**

**...**

"Hey Ma."

"Michael!" His lips twitched into a smile. "How's what ever it is you're doing?"

"Good Mom, we're all doing really well." He winced slightly as he sat back on the bed. He wasn't lying, they were for the most part doing really well. That's why Fiona insisted he called her this week, from their upgraded three bedroom suite at the Sukhothai, instead of from the hospital last week. "How's Nate and the baby watch going?"

Michael zoned out a little listening to his mother chatter on about the impending birth, switching his gaze out the door of the hotel bedroom. Fiona stood behind Sam with thin plastic gloves on her hands, carefully combing the hair dye through his gooey head evenly as they balked at each other.

"How's Fiona?" Michael swallowed a the question before answering.

"Right now she's playing hairdresser with Sam."

"Oo! Sounds like fun!" She sang. He watched Fi tug off the gloves, making a face as she tossed them in the trash. He stood up slowly, this time there was no twinge of pain in his side. He smiled at that in approval.

"I know she really wants to talk to you." His voice rose a little, and Fi's eyes flipped to him.

"Is that Madelyn?" His wife's face lit up and Michael's heart dropped a little. His smile didn't reach his eyes as he nodded at her. She grinned, grabbing at the phone.

"Talk to you soon Mom." He called as she pulled the phone away.

"Madelyn?" Fiona was almost giddy as the door to the bathroom closed with a bang. He looked at Sam.

"You look ridiculous." Michael stated, Sam raised his eyebrows.

"Why thank you Mike." Axe muttered. "Hey is she gonna tell me when to rinse this crap out?"

Micheal opened his mouth to reply before his phone rang.

"Westen." His voice was light and he couldn't help but smile. "Dan."

Sam turned his face towards his friend and Mike met his eyes before quickly looking away. Sam watched his Adam's apple bob before he pointed to the room Sam was sleeping in. Axe nodded and Michael closed the door behind him.

He sat there alone at the table for a few minutes before the door to the third bedroom opened and Jesse stumbled out still blinking exaggeratedly. He made a face at Sam.

"What's going on?" His voice was still husky with sleep.

"Well.. Mike's on the phone with our handler. Fi's on the phone with Madelyn and all my hair is going to fall out because I have no idea when to rinse this out." He pointed at his head.

Jesse let his eyebrow arch before shrugging.

"We got any yogurt left?" He asked sleepily, Sam shut his eyes.

"When do we ever not hav-?" The door to his room swung open and Michael made his way back out. He looked gravily at Sam before looking back down at the carpet.

"What's next?" Jesse sighed, scratching his side before bending back into the mini fridge.

"Mike?" Sam's voice was flat.

"Libya." He whispered.

Sam winced as Jesse's head smacked the roof of the fridge, he pulled back before looking at Westen with wide eyes.

"What?"

"They think we can get in a good position to-." Michael swallowed. "If an opportunity arises we have clearance to take out Kadifi."

Sam's mouth dropped open as Jesse sat down slowly beside him at the table. He and Mike continued to stare at each other as Jesse looked at the table. All three jumped when the door blew open and Fiona stuck out her head.

"Sam it's time to wash-." She stopped short, looking at the scene in front of her. She locked eyes with her husband before turning her face back to the phone at her ear. "Madelyn I better help him. I'll call you soon."

She dropped the phone to her side.

"What?" She was almost afraid to ask. Michael's lips pressed closed, and she gripped the doorway with her fingernails.

"New orders." Jesse whispered bravely. Her eyes switched to his, before looking at Sam again.

"Rinse your hair." She mumbled, he pushed himself up from the table and she looked back at Michael. "This is big?" He nodded, watching the look on her face change before she nodded resolutely. "I'll start packing." She left the door open and he watched her pull his mother's suitcases from under the bed and begin to unzip them.

"Me too, I guess." Jesse rubbed his face before moving past Michael and into his room. Westen swallowed still watching Fiona before dropping to the sofa and pulling a piece of paper from his back pocket. He dropped his eyes to Fiona's list, searching her reasons and the sacrifices she was apparently ready to continue making in order for him to do his job.


	8. Chapter 8

**To make up for the short chap yesterday.. this one is crazy long :)**….

"What I'm thinking is three shots are better than two. If I'm-."

"Remember what we talked about?" Michael whispered harshly. "This isn't Miami. It's not shoot and walk off into the crowd here. If we separate and something goes wrong someone's facing death or years in a Libyan prison."

"Mike-."

"Is that what you want for Sam? Or Fiona?" Michael whispered sharply. Jesse bit back what ever it was he wanted to say, looking around the room, his eyes fell on the guard at the door. "This isn't just about getting Kodafi. It's about getting our team out of here alive and that means that no one goes anywhere alone." Westen narrowed his eyes at him and nodded his head.

Jesse nodded back.

"Okay."

"I need you with me on this Jesse I'm counting on you." He pleaded.

"I'm with you." Porter promised.

"Get some sleep."

"What about you?" He raised an eyebrow.

"I'm going now." He sighed opening the door as silently as possible, kicking his legs out of his pants and slipping beneath the blanket. He held still for a moment before exhaling softly. She was awake, if she hadn't been he knew her body would have rolled towards his and her hand would have slid onto his chest, like it always did. Back when she slept."You okay?"

"You talk Jesse down from his one man crusade?" She asked softly, reaching her hand out and gripping his forearm.

"He wants this."

"We all want this." Fiona sighed, Michael turned towards her collecting her hand from his arm and wrapping it in his own. "They're mowing down their own people out there."

"Can we talk about this?" He asked softly, her eyes widened a little and she shook her head.

"Aren't we?" She asked in confusion.

"Fi.." He closed his eyes and she huffed out a frustrated breath.

"Michael?" Westen opened his eyes and stared at her.

"I want to talk about why you're not sleeping."

His bluntness startled her. He watched her lips slip open.

"We're assassinating someone in the morning. I'm supposed to just loose consciousness the second my head hits the pillow." She evaded the question, rolling her eyes at the ceiling dramatically.

"Fiona." He sighed softly, reaching out and touching her face. "Don't."

"I'm alright Michael." She smiled, bringing her hand up and lacing her fingers with his. "I'll be ready. I promise you top form tomorrow."

"I don't care about tomorrow."

"Yes you d-."

"Fiona how longs it been since you slept through the night?" He kept his voice low and even.

"Michael." She smiled sadly. "Tomorrow's a big day for us. Is this really what you think this is how we should spend the night before?"

"No." He sighed in defeat. "I want you to sleep."

"Then hold me." She sniffed wiggling into his arms. He pulled her to his chest, pressing his eyes painfully tight as he laid his cheek against the crown of her head.

…...

Michael was already wide awake when Jesse sat beside him, placing a yogurt and spoon down before him.

"Thanks."

"These guys are good. I didn't even ask, they just handed it to me." He pointed a finger at the guard.

"Yeah." Mike looked back at his map.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm still trying to figure out who goes where." He shook his head.

"I thought you said A here and B there." Jesse pointed.

"I mean who." He shook his head. "You and Fi work good together, but Sam and I have more experience with this type of work." He pointed at the map. "Fi's the best shot we have.. B has the clearest shot. So do I put the best shooter there or-."

"Maybe you should put this away for-."

"This is the most important thing I've ever done." Michael told him quickly. "If I blink and we miss this or someone gets-." He stopped swallowing back the thought.

"This isn't your first Rodeo." Jesse reminded him.

"Yeah I've never really had to worry about getting my best friend or my wife locked up in a Kadifi hell hole before." He hissed. "If it were before.. if it were just me. I'd go in look for the shot and take it if I had it and then hightail my ass out of there and hope for the best."

"Then that's what we'll do." Fiona's soft voice made both of them jump. She looked over their shoulder for a few minutes. "Jesse and I will take B. You and Sam A. We'll wait for the signal and take the shots." She turned and looked at him with a sly grin. "Don't miss Michael. You know I won't."

"Fi."

"I'll distract you." She told him bluntly. "Besides Sam's not as good with the A2 as you are."

"What am I not good at now?" Sam grumbled making his way to the table.

"Nothing you're wonderful." Michael mumbled. "Perfect."

"You know what? I don't even care that your patronizing me. I'll take it." Fiona poured him a cup of coffee, and he reached out his hand.

"You are so perfect that you are going to be my wing man today." Michael pointed to the A on the map and Sam nodded.

The team turned their head when the door bell sounded. One of the guards opened it stiffly, bowing slightly when their diplomatic contact made their way through the door. Sam watched the man cross the room and nod to Michael. Westen stood up, and shook the man's hand firmly. Sam wondered how difficult it must be to turn on your own government, no matter how tyrannical.

"Are you ready?" The man whispered.

"Only if you are." Michael looked at him seriously.

"I should have been ready long ago." He looked down at the floor before looking back up at the group. "It's time."

…...

"We're in place Jes." Sam whispered.

"Bout damn time." Jesse muttered back.

"Yeah well.. traffic." Micheal pipped in, his voice a little tighter than normal.

"Michael when this is over you are going to owe me the dinner of a life time when we get to Greece." Fiona sang.

"Anything you want Fi." He hummed.

"I'll hold you too that." Michael could tell by the sound of her words she was biting her lip. He could imagine her now, level with her weapon her eyes on her target. He mimicked the same stance.

"I know you will." He whispered back.

"Okay." Sam said softly. "It's time." Westen swallowed, carefully narrowing his gaze into the scope. He pictured his wife in his mind, the way her forehead would smooth as her eye squinted, the way her lips would twitch up when she lined her sites. "Radio Silence."

Michael Westen waited for Sam to give him the okay.

Sam Axe watched his mark with one eye and his best friend's back with the other.

"Fire at will." He told him quickly as the signal dropped before moving into a better strategic position to back Mike up.

Westen fired. Imaging his bullet at Fiona's meeting somewhere deep inside their target.

…...

Sam paced back and forth in front of the planes open door rubbing at the edges of his mouth. Michael for his part sat perfectly still on the small sofa, his fingertips poised at the bow of his lips, staring straight ahead.

They should have been back by now. Sam looked again before dropping his eyes to the guard with the hand radio.

"Anything?" He held his breath until the man shook his head, exhaling loudly. No news was good news.

"Agent Westen. We can't hold the plane much longer." The air force pilot looked at him. Michael raised his head.

"You can just go back and sit on your ass-."

"Sam." Michael snapped. "He has his orders."

"Mike-." Axe stopped when Mike stood up and started grabbing their bags.

"Agent Westen." The young man stepped in front of the door. "We have orders not to let you leave the plane, Sir."

"I'm not leaving with out my wife." He told the man quietly, resisting the burning urgency of Fiona's H&K against his belt. "So either I leave the plane or the plan sits here and wai-."

"Mike!" Sam yelled quickly his attention focused out the door of the plane before moving forward and helping Fiona up the stairs of the plane. Michael sighed, dropping back onto the sofa and pressing his palms to his eyes before reaching out an arm to her as she dropped next to him.

Sam was clapping Jesse on the the back.

"Wheels up." The pilot called into his head set and making his way back to the cockpit.

"We got caught in the crowd." Jesse explained as Micheal turned his head and pressed his lips to the side of Fiona's head. She tucked underneath his chin and closed her eyes. "I swear I thought we were made."

"Let's get the hell out of here." Sam growled before turning to the cabin crew. "Is there booze on this flight? Because we could all use a little booze right now."

…...

Fiona leaned her head against the side of the lounge chair looking out over the city of Athens. Micheal opened the balcony door but she didn't move.

"Fi." He whispered. "Come back to bed."

"It's beautiful isn't it Michael?"

"Yes." He admitted, bracing himself against the railing. "It's also three am."

"How long do you think they'll let us stay?"

"Fiona." He turned and looked at her sunken eyes and pale complexion as she blinked back a him emotionless. "This is ridiculous." Westen muttered before reaching down and scooping her off of the chair. He half expected her to fight him. He didn't know weather to be relieved or worried when she didn't.

He dropped her on the bed before flipping on the lamp beside it. She winced at the light before her eyes flashed up at him.

"I found your list." He announced. She made a face shaking her head in dismissive confusion. Micheal walked over to where his suite coat hung and dug into the pocket producing the well worn note. Her eyes widened. "I've been carrying it around in my pocket when what I should have done was.."

"Michael.." She didn't know what else she wanted to say, but her eyes were already misting over, she shook her head again, this time more out of disgust at her own weakness.

"I made my own." He looked out through the balcony doors, before flipping the paper open and sitting on the edge of the dresser.

"In the company I know who I am.

In the company I know what my life is about.

In the company I do things that I know how to do.

In the company I don't have to deal with what's right or wrong. I just have to follow orders.

In the company I feel like I am a part of something bigger."

He stopped swallowing hard and trying to catch his breath. Fiona's lips shook as the tears left her eyes.

"In the company I get to prove to everyone who wrote me off that they were wrong. That I'm a good operative. A good man."

"In the company I'm forcing my choices on everyone else. Sam feels out of touch and out of place. Jesse is over eager and naive. I miss my mother for the first time in my entire life." He chuckled at the last part and Fiona's head tilted to the side as she choked out a small sob. "Fi is sullen and withdrawn and can't sleep at night.." He moved off of the dresser, dropping to his knees and leaning forward onto the bed. ".. and I wake up early each morning wondering if today is the day that her faith in me runs out.. I know if Fiona's not happy then I can't be happy. I know that the only person who I need to think I'm a good man is her."

Fi moved her body forward and wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing her damp face against his collar bone as he joined her on the bed. Stretching them out on the mattress.

"I'm sorry." She whispered.

"No." He told her softly, kissing her face when she lifted her chin to look at him. He shook his head slowly. "I think the assassination of Omar Kadifi is a nice swan song."

"Michael this job mean's so much to y-." He shushed her quickly.

"Let's go home." He told her softly, brushing back the hair from her face. "It's time to go home."

…...

"Morning." Michael weaved between the deck chairs before settling in front of his friend. He smiled, seeing Sam Axe in swimwear beside a pool with an umbrella drink did make him feel like he was seeing his buddy released back into his natural habitat.

"It's afternoon Mikey." He raised an eyebrow at him over his sunglasses. "You and the Mrs. have a long night of celebration last night?"

"Something like that." Michael told him honestly.

"If you are here with marching orders that I suggest you just keep on marching Buddy because Sammy needs some R&R before he straps on his boots again."

"Nah. We're good here till the end of the week." He looked around the pool before taking off his own sunglasses. "Then I figure we'd just head back home."

"Home?" Sam sat up a little, looking at Michael. "Miami home?"

"Yeah. I figured we'd go to Carlitos, maybe take a job. Wait for my mom to get back home."

"How long are we talking here?" Sam's eyebrows arched.

"I don't know Sam I think I'm done." Westen looked away, studying the skyline, the pool, the hotel.

"Done?" Sam asked incredulously.

"What do you do after you assassinate Kadifi? An arms deal?" He shrugged his shoulders.

"Mike." He turned back to face Axe's face, smiling at his expression. "You mean this?"

"Yeah Sam, I mean this. Let's go home."

"I'll march to those orders Brother." He held up his drink before taking a long gulp. Michael smiled again.

…...


	9. Chapter 9

"I didn't see this coming." Jesse whispered softly, looking from Sam to Michael.

"You're telling me." Sam snorted,Westen shot him a look.

"What did Dan say?" Porter asked distracted.

"I thought it was important to talk to everyone first." Michael pressed his lips together and looked back up a Jesse. "Figure out where everyone wanted to go."

"Where I wanted to go?"

"You just helped assassinate one of the worst dictators of our time." Axe told him. "You have options."

"I don't even.."

"They'd find you people to work with. Good people. Probably some Sam and I knew. Dan's a good guy he'd be good to you." Michael stopped. "Or you could come back home with us. Go back to Counter Intel."

"Help us work a job here or there." Sam raised an eye brow. Jesse looked at Michael who held his gaze with out expression.

"I don't know."

"I'll tell Dan you haven't ruled anything out." He nodded before standing and starting towards the door.

"Mike?" Jesse called quickly. "This thing with Fi? She's not sick or anything.."

"She's alright Jesse." Michael told him quickly with an additional nervous nod before he strode out of the room with his usual purpose.

…...

"Dan." Michael breathed into the phone.

"Michael?" His surprise made Westen's mouth dry. "This is a surprise. I told you to take the week."

"I need out." Take the bull by the horns, he decided nodding to himself.

"Of Greece?"

"Of the Company." Westen Clarified, slowly sitting on the edge of the bed.

"You cannot be serious." Dan's words came out in a long string.

"I.. It's not what I want any more." He breathed.

"Michael you've been away for a long time. It's going to take a while before you feel-."

"A lot happened in those four years Dan." He closed his eyes. "I can't come back."

"You need to take some time to-."

"Dan." Michael's voice was calm, his handler waited. "I need out. Sam and Fiona and I want to go back to our lives."

"And Jesse?"

"He wants to know what his options are."

"He's defiantly got some." Dan mumbled.

"He'll be happy to hear that." Westen took a breath. "You should call him."

"Michael?" He caught the change in tone, his eye brows furrowing. "This is why I told you back then to get as far away from her as possible."

Westen grinned at the other man's warm voice.

"Thank you Dan. For everything."

"I'll be in touch." He said in his usual cryptic tone before ending the call.

…...

It was all Fiona could do not to run when she saw Madelyn Westen clutching her hands and looking around the baggage claim with her big white sunglasses and bright yellow oversized open blouse blowing with the breeze from the door.

"Michael." She whispered, grabbing her husbands arm.

"There she is!" Sam bellowed. "Maddy!"

Michael Westen watched his mother's eyes light up as she pulled back the glasses and smiled at them. Her arms opening widely. That was all it took for Fi who hurried forward in a blur of blue and long locks of hair. Madelyn's eyes shut tightly as she wrapped her arms around her daughter in law.

Jesse laughed softly from behind them before he reached across Michael to grab a bag from the conveyor belt and handed it to Sam.

Maddy kept her arm around Fiona's waist as they made their way over. His mother gripped him at the elbow with her free hand as he leaned in and kissed her on the cheek.

"Hi Mom." He whispered she wrinkled her nose at him when she smiled, cuffing his cheek softly before turning around into Sam's tight embrace.

"I missed you." Axe told her softly.

"I missed you all so much." She told him. "Jesse get over here."

Fiona took another step back until she could lean against him, he rubbed her bare arms with his hand. Sighing in surprised relief.

"Come on!" She told them quickly before pointing towards the door. "We need to get back."

…...

Nate Westen looked out the window of his kitchen and waited impatiently.

"She said they'd be back before we have to leave." Ruth whispered, he turned to look at her.

"They will be." She patted the baby's back a few times. "We have to leave in ten minutes."

"Then they have ten minutes." He told her softly.

"My family is waiting at the church!" She rolled her eyes, handing him the infant.

"They can wait ten more minutes, Ruth." He gave her a pleading look before dropping his gaze to his daughter, then back to the window. "Here they are."

He moved past her and towards the front door as Madelyn pulled it open.

"Cutting it close!" Nate yelped.

"I know! I know! I'm sorry." She waved at him before giving Fiona a little shove towards the baby. Nate smiled giving her a little nod and moving his arms towards her.

"I need to wash my-." Madelyn was already squirting her with hand sanitizer, she rubbed them quickly before reaching towards Nate.

"Fi relax." He chuckled, moving his daughter in to her ridged arms. "You're not going to drop her." He backed up towards his wife and took her hand.

Fiona turned slowly, pulling her eyes from the baby and looking at Michael. The left side of his mouth rose just enough for Madelyn to practically cheer.

"She's beautiful. Isn't she beautiful?" She cooed.

Westen's eyebrow lifted and dropped a few times before he nodded, reaching out a finger towards his niece. Fiona pulled her back protectively looking at Maddy who squirted her son's hands while he rolled his eyes.

"Can I touch her now?" He groaned flatly at his wife.

"You want to hold her?" She asked shyly. Micheal swallowed, looking at Nate who nodded encouragingly.

"You can help me put her in the little car thingy." He pointed to the infant seat on the table and Michael gingerly took his brother's child from his wife, lifting her towards his shoulder with Fiona's watchful eye following him. She kept her hand behind the baby's head until it nuzzled against Westen's shoulder. He crossed the room to Nate, grinning at his younger brother.

…...

"Doesn't Fi look happy holding that baby?" Madelyn Westen told Sam as loudly as possible over her son's shoulder.

"She looks like a natural." Sam agreed, they both turned and stared at Michael with toothy grins. He winced back. She did not in any way look like a natural, or particularly happy. More like cautiously optimistic, that's the best Michael could describe it.

"Hey. Who wants a turn?" Fiona appeared and Madelyn scooped up her grand daughter and Michael happily hurried his wife away.

"Grandma's going to get you some cousins." She muttered to Mackenzie. "No matter what it takes. And with those two, it may take an awful lot." Sam snickered at her.

"She's recruited Sam." Michael muttered, watching them from a few feet away.

"Saw that coming." Fiona reached for a carrot stick, crunching it loudly.

"We've been here for four hours." He whined, wrapping his arms around her and pressing his chin into the back of her head. She smiled, leaning back against his chest and reaching up with the rest of the carrot. He took it unconsciously, crunching it slowly.

"You're doomed." She sighed, he turned his head and looked at her crooked smile.

"You want this?" His hand flew out and gestured to all the baby paraphernalia in the room.

"Maybe.." She widened her eyes at him. "You don't?"

"I.. I don't know if I don't." He shook his own head in confusion.

"Us civilians like to call that a maybe." She told him, biting into another vegetable. Michael narrowed his eyes at her and she smiled.

"Mike." He tilted his head to the side.

"Yeah Jesse?"

"Phone for you." He held up his cell phone and looked at him. Westen looked at Fiona before she slowly pulled herself upright. His arms fell away and he reached for the phone.

"Westen."

"Jesse and I have an idea we think you might be interested in." Dan told him with out any fan fare. "If you have a minute the three of us can chat."

"I'm kind of -." Michael looked back at his mother and Sam. "-in the middle of something."

"I'm in the black sedan out front." He rolled his eyes.

"Then I guess now's good." He smirked, wondering when his days of rolling meetings and mysterious cars would be over.


	10. Chapter 10

"What the hell was that?" Fiona yelped, jumping up from Nate's front step as Jesse and Michael climbed out of the car. "You said a few minutes. That was an hour ago Michael! What the hell were you thinking?"

"Whoa." Jesse raised his palms and moved past them and back inside.

"We'll talk about it tonight." Michael told her, shaking his head slowly.

"I'm sure we will. We're also going to talk about it right n-."

"They want me to be his handler." Michael blurted, putting his hands softly on her shoulders. She opened her mouth but shut it quickly. He smiled at her. "Exactly."

"Just Jesse?" She asked softly.

"For now." He nodded. "Then they'd possibly add more over time."

"Is that something you want?" She shook her head.

"I don't know." He said honestly.

"What if it just makes you stir crazy?"

"I don't know." He repeated, she just stared. "Are they ready to go back to the hotel?"

"I think so." She whispered. Michael smiled, pressing a kiss to her temple before moving past her and holding open the front door.

…...

"Michael-." Madelyn looked at him sharply.

"I'm sorry." He held up his hands. "It's not a good idea to blow off the boss when he shows up in your state and tells you to get in the car."

"I thought you retired." She snapped.

"Yeah well Jesse hasn't." He mumbled.

"Whatever. Next time call or something. Fiona was getting cagey. I think maybe your wife has some aversion to you being driven off in strange vehicles. " They both looked at Fi. Michael grimaced. "Rightly so."

"She's okay." He told her softly.

"She's lost weight Michael. Weight she didn't have enough of in the first place." His mother grumbled, Westen let his eyes slide up and down Fiona's slight form.

"She hasn't been sleeping." He told her remorsefully.

"Or eating?" Madelyn asked almost violently.

"She eats." He said softly. "She's been under a lot of stress Mom. It'll be better now."

"It better be." She pointed her finger at her son. "You better be."

He nodded, as she gave his arm a swat before crossing the floor to the kitchen.

"What'd you do?" Nate asked softly, when Michael joined him where he was leaning against the wall.

"I'm a bad husband." He admitted, he quirked up an eyebrow. "You?"

"Took Mackenzie outside without a hat." He confessed. "Apparently babies loose 90% of their heat throught their heads or something."

"It's August." The older Westen brother groaned.

"Yeah.. I mentioned that." He took a deep breath. "Apparently that was not the point." Michael grimaced. "So when exactly are you taking mom back to Miami?" Nate turned to look at his brother, who just kept staring straight ahead.

…...

Michael Westen's eyes snapped open at the sound of his wife's frantic yell. His right hand shot under his pillow and his left hand reached towards her.

Fiona scrambled off the bed her hair wiping around as she took in the room before backing into the dresser.

"Fi?" Her wild eyes flashed at him as he dropped the gun and climbed across the bed to her.

"Michael." She breaths out a soft whisper, her eyes bouncing from wall to wall. "Where are we?"

"Vegas." He stood in front of her for a moment, his forehead wrinkling at the disheveled mess. "Fiona?"

"Vegas." She breathed.

He reached out carefully, swiping at the sweat on her temple with his thumb. She leaned into his touch and he brought both hands to her face. She shook under his fingers, her hand were cold and clammy resting against his bare abs.

"Fiona." He tried to sound calm, but just came out sounding as stunned as he felt. She looked at him for a second before swallowing hard. He watched the expression on her face start to fade, but her body still gave away her barely contained terror. She straightened, shaking her head and trying to break away from him.

"I'm sorry I woke you." She bit her lip, pushing him back a little starting towards the bathroom. He didn't let go, his hand was still wrapped around her forearm when she turned on the sink.

"I don't care that you woke me." He grunted incredulously, moving her back from the sink and grabbing a washcloth and running it under the water before carefully wiping her face in slow strokes. "I care about whatever is going on with you."

"I'm alr-." She started her weak protest.

"Stop it." He shushed her. "You had a nightmare?" Her eyes clicked up to his before clouding over. "Fiona what-?"

Her chest heaved before she knocked his hands away with her elbows and hunched over the toilet.

"Shit." He muttered, dropping the towel back in the sink and grabbing her hair back from her face as she threw up. Michael winced at her airy cry before she started again. He pressed his palm against her back. She leaned against him as she stood back up. Michael wrapped his arms around her waist and moved her to the wall. He pulled the washcloth out again. "Tell me what's going on."

It was no long a soft concerned request. It was now a worried order that she knew better than to ignore.

"Nightmare." She shook her head dismissively.

"How long have you been having-?"

"Since Vaughn." She interrupted sharply before looking away. His mouth slipped open and he let out a breath like she'd punched him in the gut.

"Fiona that was six months ago." He gripped her shoulders.

"I-." She stopped herself, rubbing her palm across her eye and down to her chin before forcing herself to look at her husband's crestfallen expression. "It's not like it's every night."

"That's why you won't sleep.." He looked at the wall, swallowing hard, she brought her hands up to his wrists. "How did I not notice this?" He asked the wall, still unable to look back down at her.

"You were a little busy." She told him defensively.

"We sleep in the same bed Fiona." He dropped his eyes to her, wincing at her blotchy pale complexion. Michael slid his palm against her face.

"I'd get up." She whispered. "I didn't want to wake you. I was just going to deal with it on my own. I-." Her voice broke and she started to cry. He pressed a kiss to the top of her head, wrapping his arms around her. "I never wanted you to have to know about this."

"Fiona you'd never let me go through something like this on my own." He whispered into her hair.

"You'd never go through something like this." She sniffed angrily

"I've had nightmares before Fi. You know that."

"Not like this. Not-." Her body sagged against him and he lifted her into his arms and carried her back to the bed. "Michael I can't go back to sleep now." She pleaded.

"You're right you can't. We're going to talk about this." He laid her down before crawling over her and pulling the blankets back around them.

"There is nothing to say." Her shaky voice made him wrap her tighter, stroking the long strands of hair off of her shoulders and down her back. "I thought they'd stop. Once you came home. Once we went to Thailand. Once we left Bangkok. Once we went back to Bangkok. Once you said you were finished with it all. I thought for sure tonight.."

Fiona weaved her fingers with his, grasping to get them as tight as possible. Michael was still trying to understand how she could be waking up at night while he slept through it. He rubbed her back

"When we were at the loft when I first got back did this-?" He stopped, pulling back to look at her face, she thought for a second before shaking her head."Then when?"

"They kept your mom overnight at the hospital so I went back to my hotel and that was the first time.." Her voice trailed off and Michael swallowed back the guilt at the fact she'd spent that night alone. He should have been there with her. "Then Sam and I stayed at your mom's until Jesse was released. When Sam went to go get him, I just.. I started thinking about..I just had to get out of there. So I went to loft to be by myself until you got home."

"Then we moved into the Victor and it started all over again?" He guessed, she nodded. He looked at the clock next to the bed. "I'm gonna see if Nate's up."

"What?" She shook her head as he groped for his cell phone and text his brother. "Michael what-?"

He set the phone down and took her shoulders again.

"It's hotels."

"What?"

"What are the dream about?" She flinched away and he moved his hand to her cheek. "Fiona?"

"Michael don't make me-."

"After the thing with O'Neil I couldn't close my eyes for ten minutes without seeing you face down in the damn water." He told her softly. "I went over it again and again and again." She put her hand over his. "What do you think about?"

"What if I didn't go after you?" She whispered. "What if Sam showed up a minute later? Or if I didn't go back and you.. then Sam..." Her lips trembled and he ran his thumb over them.

His phone chirped and he picked it back up smiling before typing a reply.

"Get dressed." He sighed.

"Wha-?"

"We are going to get you the hell out of this hotel." He kissed her brow before sliding out of the bed and pulling on a pair of pants. "Any hotel." He gave her a long look. "Then tomorrow we're going home."


	11. Chapter 11

**Nicole.. did you sneak into my home and read future chapter notes for this story.. ;) ps.. a few million chapters ago someone sent me a review saying that none of this was actually going to happen on the show.. um I know.. cause if it was i wouldn't be feeding my kids canned ravioli for dinner. :) but if you want my predictions pm me! **

**And I did add one prediction in this chap, that is if Dodge is at all smart with it's product placement.. cause even I want one.. if i didn't have four kids...**

...

He was getting tired, but Michael Westen was taking his current surveillance mission very seriously. He watched her face closely for any signs of tension. Finding none, he settled back against the seat of the plane, but kept his eyes on his wife.

"Sam we have a problem." He sighed, stretching his legs out as far as he could, wondering again why he had gotten stuck in the middle seat.

"I kinda figured when we rushed out of Vegas faster than we did Libya." His best friend whispered back, still gazing out the window of the plane. "Dan having problems letting you go?"

"No." He shook his head before glancing at Sam. "Well, yeah, but that's not our biggest problem." He looked back at Fiona, Sam followed his gaze.

"I don't think I like where this is going." Axe sighed before rubbing his face.

"She's not sleeping, having nightmares. She was so worked up last night she got sick." Michael sighed.

"She's hyper vigilant too, Mike." Sam announced from behind his hand. "She's over arming for missions-even for her. Jesse says when she's not avoiding him she's completely non-trusting. When I asked what happened in Libya he said she was 'twitchy' about the crowds." Sam shook his head. "Fi. Twitchy."

"How'd I miss this?" Michael whispered.

"We all just had different pieces of the puzzle that is Fiona." Sam decided, dropping his hand and looking at their patient. "You knew she wasn't sleeping, your mom said right away she'd lost weight. Jesse knew she was.. twitchy.." Michael winced.

"It's been six months Sam. This is about the showdown with Vaughn." He shook his head. "That's Chronic PTSD."

"Right after you left I knew something was wrong. Come on she practically ran from the house when I brought Jesse back. Before that I couldn't go to the refrigerator without tripping over her. Fi and I are close but we're not that close. She's been my shadow lately too, Mike."

Westen thought for a minute before leaning back over to look at her sleeping face.

"She feels like you can protect her." He said calmly.

"Mike?" Sam shook his head.

"You saved her from Vaughn." The guilt was once again palpable. "You saved all of us from Vaughn."

"Almost home!" Madelyn's voice came from no where. Michael winced as Fiona's little body jumped. Sam shushed quickly but it was too late. Her eyes flipped open wide. "Oh sorry."

Westen quickly brought his hand up, brushing the hair from his wife's face.

"Hey." Michael smiled, locking his eyes with her. "Hi."

She drew in a staggered breath before smiling back at him weakly. Maddy looked from the pair then back to Sam.

"I should go back to Jesse." She told them absently, looking back at Fiona before creeping back to her own seat. Sam followed her with his eyes, Fi drank the last of Michael's water, her eyes switching between the two men.

"So." She asked, clearing her throat quickly. "Did you decide what to do with me?" The boldness of her voice did nothing to hide her fear. Michael kissed her hand. "Pick a nice looney bin for me or just a quick two to the back of the head?"

"Too messy." Sam told her frankly. Westen rolled his eyes. Fiona smiled.

"We're gonna figure this out Fi." Michael promised, re-gripping their hands. She laid her head on his shoulder. Sam went back to looking out the window, his mind already working.

"I know." She told him.

…...

Michael was still standing in the door way of the loft long after Fiona had drug the suitcases back to an empty spot. He watched her flop onto the bed and start taking off her boots.

"What?" She asked curiously watching him look around the space.

"Nothing. I was just.. remembering."

"Good memories?" She continued, blinking at him.

He shrugged before pulling her handgun from his belt and setting it on the workbench before stepping out of his shoes.

"Of when I first moved in." He inhaled slowly. "Of when I first got burned."

"So bad memories." She decided, pulling her shirt off before pointing to the boxes by the door. He shook his head in answer to her statement before reaching into one of her packing boxes.

"No. Not necessarily." He rummaged, moving pieces of her clothing around until he found a silky nightgown and held it up for approval, she reached out her hand and he joined her on the bed. "Just memories."

"We didn't talk about your job offer." Fiona whispered, wiggling into her nighty.

"It's not important." He shook his head again, helping her pull her hair out of the back.

"Yes it is." She gave him a look, his mouth broke into a sly smile.

"Not tonight." He pressed his lips to her collar bone and she sighed.

"You're right." She purred, her fingers going to the button of his pants. "Their are other more pressing things.."

…...

It took him a minute to remember he'd put the phones on vibrate and that rhythmic clatter was in fact a call. His hand chased it down while his eyes remained on Fiona.

"Hello?"

"Mike? It's Jeff Taylor. I'm calling about your Charger." Westen winced.

"Yeah." He bit his lip expecting the worst. "Sam was gonna come down today and take a look."

"I think maybe you better come by too." He told him evenly. "We've got a lot to show you."

"Okay." He exhaled the word in a huff, letting his shoulders sag.

…...

Sam sighed heavily as he climbed out of the car. He didn't want to hear what they had to say. He'd spent a lot of time with the Charger before they left for Bangkok, he knew better than anyone how bad it really was.

Mike was leaning up against their rental, with his arms wrapped around Fiona. Her head leaned back against his chest. Sam knew something was up right away, he didn't even need to be close enough to see her furrowed eyebrows.

"We ready?" I asked softly.

"Fi?" Michael asked quietly. She swallowed looking up at Sam before nodding.

"Let's do this." She pulled away charging ahead with her usual enthusiasm.

"The Charger too?" Axe whispered, Westen nodded. "She sleep?"

"About four hours." Michael reported.

"You know what we have to do here don't you?"

"Yeah." He breathed.

"Does Fi?" Westen nodded at his friend, grunting uncomfortably. Sam nodded back.

"Are you two coming or not?" Fiona called back.

"Back to her bossy self already." Sam called loudly.

"You know if I wasn't here to keep you two-." She marched into the garage and let out a loud gasp. The men exchanged glances before hurrying to catch up. "Michael."

Axe stopped in the door, watching the way Fiona's hand sculpted the hood of the gleaming Charger.

"It was the hardest restoration we've ever done here." Billy Taylor said proudly. "By far."

Michael swallowed hard, pulling his sunglasses slowly from his face. Fi's lips twitched into a smile, running her fingertips up the windowpane and onto the hood.

"We had to replace a bunch of-."

"It's perfect." Westen interrupted watching his wife open the door and slip into the passenger seat.

"It's still got the mark from when you had to toss the propane tank because you didn't listen to me about Evelyn." She sang running her hand over the grove in the dash, before shooting him a toothy smile.

"Sam said I could leave stuff like that." Jeff told him, sticking his head in the drivers window. "He said it added character." Michael nodded. "Another crazy thing happened while you were away."

"Some guy came by and gave me this. I think its for you." Westen looked at the envelope before tearing it open and letting the contents slide out. A set of Dodge keys and registration papers slid out with a note.

_Johnny, _

_Saw this and thought of you. _

_Tony _

Michael lifted his eyes up to Jeff who grinned like an idiot before ripping the tarp off the car behind them.

"Holy God." Sam exclaimed, moving across the garage towards the new ride.

"It's a 2011 R/T Max." Jeff announced of the new Charger. "It's fully loaded too. This thing is hot."

"You don't know the half of it." Fiona mumbled, her lips barely lifting, climbing out of the old Charger and making her way towards her husband.

"It's clean, Fi." He handed her the papers, she reached past him, grabbed the keys and headed towards the new car. He smirked, putting the papers back in the envelope.

"It's alright." Sam said softly patting the hood of the Charger. "Unlike Mommy... Uncle Sam loves you just as much as your little sister."

Michael turned back to the Taylor's.

"Thank you." He said softly. "Send me a bill, I mean it."

"No way. You saved my brother's life." Jeff pointed a finger at him.

"Then we're even?" Westen raised his eye brows.

"Spoken like a true big brother." Taylor smiled. "How's that baby?"

"Perfect. She looks just like her mother." Michael teased. "Thank God."

"Great." Jeff laughed, before starting towards his office. "Oh.." He stopped, opening a drawer and pulling out a box. "These were in the glove box when Billy finally pried it open. Still seem intact."

He tossed the package and Westen snatched it up before looking down. _Spark plugs_.

…...


	12. Chapter 12

"Today?" Fiona was still sitting in the R/T. Michael had slid into the passenger seat, and Sam stood outside the other door.

"Right now." Sam told her quickly. "I'm going to call Jesse and-."

"No." She said quickly. "No Jesse."

"Fi?" Michael blinked at her, she kept shaking her head.

"I'll do it, but no Jesse." She looked at the steering wheel.

"Okay." Sam said softly before opening the door to the back and climbing in. "Take me through it."

Fiona looked at Michael before slowly pulling out onto the road and heading towards the Bayshore Hotel.

…...

"Then what?" Sam asked softly, watching the way Fiona's fingers gripped the railing of the balcony. Michael reached for her and she yanked her hand away from his.

"Then Michael went to the roof.." It was an accusation and neither man missed it. Westen took a couple steps back. "And Jesse and I went to find the ingredients for explosives."

"Okay. Show me." Sam gave her an encouraging nod, she pulled her hand off the rail, hitting her back against the pile of shutters as she retreated. Michael moved forward and she jerked her body away again. Sam put up a hand to his friend as Fiona moved past him. "Michael was on the roof." He narrowed his eyes at Westen. Mike scowled, but kept his distance. "What were you thinking?"

"We um.. we were talking about Michael and me. About priorities." She said the word like it was a curse. "He said we had something special. I remember thinking not special enough. I was thinking we were all going to die for some stupid-." Her voice broke and she stopped moving. Sam swallowed hard laying his hand carefully against Fiona's back as she pointed to an empty cabinet. "The propane was there. We went back up stairs and got started, that's when Michael came through the window."

She turned and looked at her husband with barely contained contempt. Westen took a deep breath, stepping back from where he'd been lurking in the doorway.

"Then what?" Sam redirected.

"Oh this is where it really got fun Sam." She hissed, swiping at her damp eyes before charging past the both of them.

"I don't-." Michael began urgently. Axe held up a hand.

"She's already more confident, Mike."

"It's the adrenaline Sam. She's going to hit the wall."

"Good. She's been speeding towards it for six months. It's about time." He said frankly.

Westen opened his mouth, stopping when Sam put up his hand again.

"She can do this." He glared at him with serious eyes before jogging after Fiona.

…...

"And then he said it was time for me to go my own way." Fiona had stopped trying to bat away her tears, letting them run off of her jaw "He said this was him choosing me. What a fucking ridiculous way to choose me. He wasn't choosing me. If he had chosen me wouldn't be here about to die in the first place." She shook her head. Sam took note of her use of the present tense, glancing at Michael who was starring at her.

"What did you say?" Fiona shook her head. "Fi?"

Michael watched her struggle.

"Nothing." He blurted. "I didn't give her a chance I just left."

"How could you do that to me?" She yelled. "How could you just leave me here? With Jesse and that stupid list! The list. The burn notice. That's all you fucking care about."

Westen opened his mouth.

"No." Sam ordered stepping between them and grabbing Fiona by the shoulders. "What happened after her left?"

Fiona stared at him, her lower lip quivering. He tightened his grip and held her gaze.

"We covered him the best we could and then started down the hall." She moved past him and Michael and started down the hall. Her arms firmly crossed against her chest. "I just.. I couldn't.. I couldn't leave him." She stopped in the hall, rocking her body slowly backward and forward. "I.. just couldn't leave him out there to die alone." She looked at Sam. He resisted the urge to hug her. "_For better or for worse_."

"Take me to the cabana." Sam whispered inhaling slowly. She nodded and he turned her carefully back down the hall. Her eyes met Michael's and she held them until she made it to the door way, reaching out and carefully taking his hand as they started down the stairs.

She gripped it, remembering the sound of gunfire. Michael's mind joined hers as she told Sam the basics. His memory supplied the specifics

_Half clip. Quarter clip. Out_.

_Fi.. you don't have to be here.._

_When it's time, we'll do this together._

"Then you came and they took him." She finished. Westen moved towards a green spot, sitting beneath a tree and looking out at the construction site turned battle ground. Sam and Fiona stood in the middle. She ran her hands over her shoulders, hugging herself tightly.

"Can't imagine why you can't sleep after that." Sam murmured, sitting on the edge of the concrete near his buddy. "Shit I might loose a little sleep over it."

"Just another day in the life of Michael Westen." She breathed, standing in front of her husband, who for his part looked almost as pitiful as her. Fiona bit her lip, dropping her arms and letting her hands hang loosely in front of him. He reached forward and took them both in his.

The three of them sat there in silence for a long time.

…...

"You're going to have to deal with the Jesse part of this." Sam announced, his hands behind his head as he laid on his back eyes looking up at the Miami night.

"I don't even know what that's about." She sighed, Michael could feel her head shake against his arm as he slowly skimmed his fingers down her side. He let his neck drop back until his head hit the tree he was leaning against. Fiona leaned forward and scratched her dirty face against his shirt. "I just-. In the dreams I just kept remembering when he held his Sig in my face-."

"What?" Westen made a face, looking down at her. She rolled her eyes. "When-?"

"After he found out that it was you who burned him. When he found me in the loft-."

"He put a gun in your face?"

"He can shoot you in the chest but he can't put a gun in my face?" She arched her eyebrows.

"Did you know about this?" Michael looked at Sam. Axe's head shook.

"It was along time ago, Michael." She reminded.

"Yeah so long ago you're having nightmares about it." He laid back against the tree, his head still shaking.

"None of this is Jesse's fault." She shook her head.

"No it's mine." Her husband's words were soft, she lifted her eyes to his.

"That's my cue." Sam growled, sitting up. "I'm going to go check out the new Charger."

"Michael.."

"You blame me." He interrupted. "And you should."

"You never meant for any of this to happen." She shook her head.

"No. I didn't." He pushed her hair from her face and she sat up, turning to face him. "It's part of why I tried to keep you at arms length Fi. This was something I had to do, but I never wanted to hurt you." She leaned in, and he pressed his lips to hers. "I apologized to Jesse-before I knew he put a gun in my girl friends face, but what ever." She smiled at him. "But I forgot to apologize to you."

"I don't want apologies." She whispered, bringing her hands up to his chest and sliding them around his neck and molding her mouth to his. "I want you."

"You're stuck with me now." He told her before returning to her lips. Michael slid his arms underneath her before carrying her to the cabana and setting her on top of the bar. She watched him unbuckle his belt.

"Michael.." She grinned. "Sam could be here any minute."

"Then we better hurry." He mumbled, reaching under her dress for her panties.

"Now I'm concerned about your sanity." She teased, humming when his fingers slid slowly up between her folds.

"I'm making new memories." He decided looking slowly around the little room. "We almost died in here." She bit her lip as he circled his fingers around her clit a few times. "But we didn't." She moaned, grinding against his palm as he pulled her to the edge of the counter. She whimpered when he pulled his hand away, pumping himself a few times before kicking a box closer to them and testing it's weight. She took advantage of his new position, sliding herself towards him until he was right at her entrance.

He grasped her hips and moved carefully before she met his thrust.

Michael moved with the rhythm of her grasps as she bawled his shirt into her fists at his shoulders. Her temple was damp and slick against the side of his cheek as he strained to hear the soft mews or her barely constrained cries. She clutched at the back of his head, gasping as her body arched. He pulled her to him, molding their hips together as he groaned in release.

They stood still, like some erotic statue, and Michael listened to Fiona cry softly in his ear, her hand moving in comforting strokes against his sweaty hair.

"Guys?" Sam's voice maked them both jump, looking at each other guiltily. "I um.. gave Jesse a call.. he's going to come pick me up.. so.." The clink of the keys being tossed through broken boards was a distinct sound. "uh.. carry on." Michael smiled at her stunned face before she started to giggle. "Very therapeutic day.. made a lot of break throughs.." Sam called professionally. "I think you guys can take it from here."

"Good night Sam." Fiona called, still giggling. Michael pulled her close to him wiping off her tears and kissing the side of her head.

…...

"I was trying to keep you safe." He sighed softly from his spot on the floor beneath their former entryway. She sat beside him, her knees drawn up against her chest. "This isn't your fight Fi. It's mine. If I want to throw it all away for something doesn't mean that I think you should."

"I realized a long time ago that with out you.." Her voice trailed off and she sighed. "You're my fight Michael. _We_ are what I'm fighting for. And apparently I think it's worth dying for."

"I love you." He turned his head lazily against the wall. "I should have told you that the last time we sat here." Her lips twitched into a smile.

"I need you." She told him. "You want to take care of me? Take care of you. You're all I have that's worth anything."

"You'd be okay with out me." He reminded her, his eyebrows arching.

"I would be." She countered, smiling smugly before shaking her head. "But what would be the point?" He leaned forward and pecked her lips before pressing their foreheads together.

"Let's go home." He reached for the keys and pulled her to her feet.

"We're going to get the car dirty." She sighed, looking at his dusty ass.

"I could drive back naked." He teased.

"Don't tempt me." She muttered flatly, before stopping. Michael watched her eyes roam around the exterior of the Bayshore.

"You okay?" She nodded at him.

"If they ever finish it I think we should book it for a night or two." She shrugged, he snorted at her before pulling her up the hill.

…...

"Mike?" Sam whispered quietly as he carefully opened the door. Westen put his finger to his lips before meeting him on the stairs. "How's it going?"

"What's up Sam?"

"You have a meeting with Jesse and Dan." He announced. "Jes tried to call you. He said you didn't answer."

"It's on vibrate." He explained rubbing his hand through his hair. "I-. I can't go."

"Yes you can." He looked back at the door. "I'll stay here. You go to your meeting, then go back to my place and get some sleep. You look almost as bad as she does."

"Sam I-." The other man pulled out his house key and handed it to his friend.

"Go." Axe shooed him a little with his hands.

"Thanks." He relented, jogging down the steps. "I won't be long."

"Be long." Sam waved a finger before carefully opening the door and slipping inside.

…...

"Mike I tried to call you like-."

"Yeah. Sorry." He said bluntly, moving past him. Dan looked between the two of them before gesturing for Michael to sit. ''Problems with the phone."

"How's Fiona?" Michael's handler asked innocently.

"Fine." Westen said quickly.

"Jesse said she's been having som-."

"No. Fiona's fine." He interrupted again. "We aren't here to talk about her are we?"

"No." Dan gave him a quick nod. "We're here to talk about Jesse. And our offer."

"I haven't had enough time to consider your offer." Dan looked down, tapping his pencil against his notebook. "As for Jesse, Sam thinks he should work with Peacock."

"Peacock?" Dan smiled. "Really."

"Yes."

"Um what's Peacock?"

"It's a land bird with long decorative feathers." Micheal told him dryly, turning back to Dan. "He gives directions well and Jesse learns quickly."

"Will you quit talking about me like I'm not in the room?" Porter yelped. Michael turned towards him slowly, and blinked. Jesse felt the chill radiating off of him. "I'm just saying I'm not some newbie."

"Yes. Yes you are." He told him firmly, before addressing Dan. "He has limitless potiential if he's given the right teacher."

"Teacher? What the hell's going on?"

"You're overconfident. Left on your own you'll end up dead." Michael stated calmly.

"I was doing just fine on my own until you came along!"

"You know that might have made me feel guilty before I knew you held a gun on my wife." Westen shouted over the other man's protests. Jesse froze. "You better be damn glad I just found that out."

"Mike.." Porter began, before the spy shook his head.

"You obviously have things to work out between the two of you before we-."

"No." Westen looked back at Dan. "I'm still on the fence about being his handler, but I'm sure about pairing him up with Peacock. I'm assuming he's still in Libya, since he's been silent for days?"

"I'd assume so."

Jesse was still staring at Michael with something akin to guilt.

"Who again is-?" He moved his hand in a circular motion.

"It's a code name for a undercover agent Sam and I have both worked with. He's the best of the best."

"He has a code name?" Jesse made a face.

"His cover is more legendary then Chuck Finley." Michael explained. "We don't use it, in any circumstance."

"I'll see about making the contact." Dan said softly. "I'll give you some more time to.." He looked at Jesse before looking back at Michael. Westen nodded, grabbing his sunglasses off the desk and making his way to the door.

Jesse caught up with him on the steps.

"Mike come on!" He called. "Stop."

He shut his eyes and waited for Porter to catch up.

"Is she alright?"

"No. Jesse." He looked at the sky. "She's not alright."

"I get that your pissed off and I would be too, but she forgave me for what happened at the loft. She didn't even think twice about it." He exhaled.

"Well now she's having nightmares about it." Westen interrupted. "I think that counts as thinking twice."

"I'm gonna stop by and see-."

"Don't." Michael snapped, setting his jaw before continuing. "She'll call you, I'm sure.."

"Mike."

"You mean a lot to her Jesse. I'm sure when she's feeling better she'll give you a call." He looked at his feet before picking up his pace and leaving Porter standing on the steps of the government building.

…...


	13. Chapter 13

"Fi." Sam coaxed her gently. "Fiona wake up."

"No." She shot up quickly, Axe had to duck out of the way.

"Hey. It's okay." Sam told her, softly dropping his hand on her shoulder.

"Where's Michael?" She whispered, running the back of her hand across her mouth.

"He had a meeting with Jesse and Dan. Then I sent him to my place to sleep." Sam stood up and walked back over to the kitchenette. "I made you.." He stopped, looking at his watch. "Well lets call it brunch."

"You made me-?"

"Yeah." He looked back at her. "Omelet- egg whites only. Cinnamon french toast and yogurt with fresh fruit."

"Sam." She crept towards him and sat at the table. For an insane moment he thought she was going to cry.

"Come on Fi. It's eggs and toast." He shook his head, dropping the plate in front of her. "It's not like I gave you a kidney. Eat."

"When did Michael check in last?" Fiona asked, cutting her toast into pieces.

"He's fine, Fi. Eat." Sam tossed the dishtowel over his shoulder.

"How do you know if he hasn't checked-?" Sam huffed, putting up his hand and reaching for his phone.

"Hey Dave? It's Sam Axe from next-door? Yeah I just got back a few days ago. A buddy of mine is supposed to be stopping by today and I can't get him on my phone. Can you take a look over the fence ad tell me if you see a car? Sure." He waited looking at Fiona. She was staring at her plate. "Yep that's him. No! No, don't bother, he's been driving for hours. I'm sure he's passed out. Thanks."

"He's there?" She sighed, lifting her fork to her mouth.

"An _old-timey _black car is in my driveway." Sam shook his head. "Kids these days have no knowledge of fine motor vehicles. Now eat."

"Thanks Sam." She chewed, smiling in surprise.

"Yeah, don't thank me yet. As soon as you're done we need to recap your dream." She looked at him, swallowing hard. He gave her a stern look. "Full desensitization means full desensitization."

Fiona cocked her head at him before giving him a dirty look and shoving another bite into her mouth.

…...

"Mike?" Sam called from the door way a second time before Michael stirred. He rolled over onto his back and looked at the ceiling.

"What time-?"

"It's almost four." Sam told him absently, picking up a few items of clothing littering his bedroom floor.

"Four?" Westen shot up rubbing his face and looking at his watch. "You let me sleep until four?"

"I would have let you sleep later but you left your phone at the loft." He held it up and the other man made a grab for it. Sam pulled it back. "I answered it, before it woke up Fiona."

"Sam.." Michael suddenly knew where this was going. He pointed his finger at his friend. "Give me the phone."

"Your real-estate agent called." Sam grinned. "She _can_ show you that property today at five."

"Tell me you didn't tell Fiona." He dropped his face to his hands.

"Oh no, your secrets safe with me, Mikey. But are you sure you want to be that far away from your mom? I mean I'm sure you could find a nice little place in Coral Gables."

Michael moaned.

"Can we not do this now?"

Axe seemed to consider that for a moment before nodding.

"Yeah. I think I need some more time to come up with some good one liners anyway." He huffed. "I've been on duty all day. No beer Mike. I'm really not at my best."

"How's Fi?" His voice was soft, nearly afraid of the answer.

"Alright." Sam shrugged. "She had a nightmare about being caught in a gun battle while shopping with your mom." Michael made a face. "So I sent her shopping with your mom."

"Are you sure-?"

"Full desensitization means full desensitization!" He snapped.

"You're right." Westen grumbled before Axe tossed him his phone.

"Call and check on her before we head over to meet your relator at the possible 'Casa de Westen'."

…...

"Hello?" Michael called softly opening the door to his mother's house. "Anybody home?"

"Shh!" His mother hushed him from the couch.

"She's asleep?" He crept into the room as Madelyn nodded.

"We were trying on our new clothes and she fell asleep waiting for me to come back in." Maddy stood up and opened the door to the guest room. Michael couldn't help but smile at her, laying against the pillows in a lime green sundress with the tags still attached, a big floppy white sunhat shadowing her face.

"She been quiet?" He asked softly, his mother nodded. "Shopping was okay?"

"She was her usual self. Maybe a little quieter." He swallowed before leaning over and kissing his mother's cheek.

"Thanks Mom." Maddy smiled back before slipping out of the room. Michael sighed, creeping forward and moving away the shopping bags and easing onto the bed beside her. She rolled towards him instinctively, her hand falling against his chest. Westen's eyes slipped shut and he laid his hand over hers and sighed in relief.

He listened to her slow breathing until his own matched it and he found himself drifting off as well.

He woke up to her fingers grazing his cheek in slow strokes.

"Hi." He whispered, raising his eyebrows with out opening his eyes.

"When did you get here?" She hummed. Michael squeezed her hand as he stretched out his body. Fiona poked his side and he grunted, a smile coming to his lips.

"Around seven, I think. And now it's.." He pulled both of their hands up, looking at his watch. "..three am."

"You're kidding me." She breathed, yanking his wrist towards her. He winced and she made a face a the time. "We slept literally all day."

"We needed it." He sighed, pulling off her sunhat and running his fingers through her hair before something dawned on him. "You've been asleep over eight hours."

"And?" It was her turn to stretch. He watched her little body arch, admiring the sundress. She turned back and looked at his serious face.

"And?" He asked her pointedly. Her lips parted as she thought.

"I don't remember anything." Her voice was airy light and it made Michael smile. The real one, his wife mused, the one that reached his eyes and left little crinkles at the corners.

He nodded at her, swallowing hard.

"It's a good start." He decided, pressing his lips to her head for a split second. "How 'bout you take the tags off your dress and we'll go get some breakfast? Then I wanna show you something."

"Show me something?" She gave him a questioning look.

"A surprise." He grinned, she grinned back.


	14. Chapter 14

**_Okay.. another little insight into my psyche. I love love love the real life guy that I made Jesse's new partner. He's amazingly smart and I sometimes actually wonder if he's more than meets the eye. I mean the man speaks fluid arabic.. Alright back to the story.. _**

_..._

"Look. The sun's coming up." Westen whispered, pointing with his free hand.

"Where are we going?" Fiona asked, with a little bit of a whine as Michael moved her through the residential neighborhood.

"I told you I want to show you something. I need your opinion." He said evenly.

"Is this about a job?"

"No." He stopped, turning her towards one of the houses. "It's about us."

"It's a house." She said flatly.

"Yes." He sighed, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her back against his chest. "A house. We'll probably be needing one of those eventually don't you think." She straightened against him. "Unless you want to move in with my mom?"

"You want to buy this house?" Fiona whispered, he nodded against her shoulder.

"I've been working on your list." He told her softly. "This one has.. a nice yard you know.. for cousins.. maybe." She turned her head and blinked at him. "Been empty for about a year so it needs some TLC, but it's nice. It's got hurricane shutters, Tuscan tiles, a sun room that will make my mom incredibly jealous."

She settled her hands over his and laced her fingers with his.

"Oh!" His voice was light and airy. "Best part? The kid was in band. The little pool house is completely soundproof."

"That is a big perk." She hummed.

"It's got a big master bedroom with a great bathroom and a walk in closet that you're going to love. Three more bedrooms on the east side."

"Three!" Fiona laughed. "Michael I'm over thirty five, you know."

"We don't have to fill them all with-." He stopped. "I mean at least one of them we should probably save for Sam."

"And what about when you realize you're not done and run off on some mission somewhere and leave me with two.. bedrooms?"

Micheal looked down at her tilting his head to the side before opening his mouth.

"Well.." He began. She smiled.

"And Sam." They said together.

"I don't plan on going anywhere Fi." He told her kissing her temple before pressing his face into her hair.

"I wanna see inside." She whispered excitedly.

"We can call the agent-."

"Oh please. I'm sure we can pick that lock with our eyes closed, Michael." She pulled away from him and hurried towards the house.

…...

Fiona Westen stared at the sky light above where she and Michael lay on the floor of the master bedroom.

"It's perfect Michael." She told him softly. "I want it."

"You ready for this?" He asked her seriously. She smiled at him.

"I've been ready for this since Belfast." She reminded him. "I've just been waiting for you to catch up." Westen smiled at her bringing their clasped hands to his lips and kissing her fingers. She sighed happily before "We need furniture. You need to make a career decision."

"I haven't answered Dan yet, about Jesse." Fiona both loved and hated the tone of voice he was using. It was unsure and purely Michael, or at least the vulnerable side of him. She considered herself privileged to be among the small number of people who ever got to hear it.

"What are you thinking?" She asked softly.

"I'm thinking he needs me." Michael admitted. "I'm also thinking I'd like to try out the soundproof room on him."

"What would you have done Michael? If you were him?" She raised her eyebrows and he shook his head.

"I wouldn't go after someone's family."

"He was going after someones _accomplice_." She started to shake his head but he slid his hand against her cheek and shook his own.

"He knew exactly what he was doing." Michael told her. "It was a message."

"He didn't hurt me." She soothed.

"He didn't have to." He countered. "He's reckless. He lets his emotions get the best of him. He can't keep his eyes focused on the mission. How many times has he shown us that?"

"A few." She smiled, Michael narrowed his eyes and smirked at her.

"That's why you're attracted to him." He accused playfully.

"I'm not-."

"Oh, yes. You are." He laughed. "And that's why."

"I'm married!" She squawked.

"Married. Not dead." He pulled her closer.

"Are you taking the job or not?" She whined, swatting his shoulder.

"Are you okay with it?" He asked softly. "Me being his handler?"

She arched her eyebrow at him.

"Aren't you afraid I'll run off with him and leave you with the bedrooms?"

"No." He shook his head and gave her an endearing smile before switching to a serious tone. "I'm not doing this if it's not what you want."

"If it's what you want? It's what I want."

…...

"How's Fi?" Jesse asked as he slid into the passenger side of the Charger.

"She's fine. She Sam and my mom are shopping for furniture. Someone blew her's up." He reported curtly.

"How much furniture can you actually fit in the loft anyway?" Jesse shrugged.

"We bought a house yesterday." Westen sighed, Porter gaped at him.

"You're kidding."

"My bank account begs to differ."

"Yesterday?" Michael nodded. "You guys just bought a house."

"You'd be surprised how much interest your money can accrue when it sits untouched for four years." He pursed his lips.

"You paid cash?" Jesse almost shouted, the other man nodded again. "You paid cash for a house?"

"Yeah." He sighed. "Look. We should talk about what's about to happen."

"Finally get to meet big bird huh?" Jesse teased.

"This is a big deal." Westen stopped at the light and turned to face Porter, pulling his sunglasses off. "If this man's cover is blown you and I are both back on the shit list and their won't be any getting off." Jesse looked back out the windshield. "Not to mention he'll be killed pretty much on site. So I'm going to introduce you to his cover. We'll talk about things that have no significance to anything and then once we're secure you can ask questions. Understood?"

"I don't thin-."

"Do you understand?" Michael interrupted.

"Got it. Understand. Chrystal clear."

"Good."

"Fi's really okay?" Michael took a deep breath, his body stiffening despite his attempts to loosen it. He pulled into a parking lot his fingers still gripping the steering wheel. He didn't turn towards Porter this time.

"New rule." Michael told him calmly. "Don't talk about my wife."

"Are you gonna be able to get past this?"

"You got past what I did to you." Westen nodded his head once. "I'll get past this."

"Will Fi?"

"You're breaking the new rule." Mike swallowed, He kept looking out the windshield until Jesse sighed and looked away.

"We should get to the meeting place."

"This is the meeting place." Mike sighed.

"This is WTVJ."

"NBC Miami." Mike nodded. "Remember what I said." He opened the car door. "Follow my lead."

Jesse screwed up his face and followed Michael into the building and up to the information desk.

"Hello we're here to meet with-."

"Michael Westen?" He lifted his eyes to his friend and pretended like they'd never met.

"Yes."

"Richard Engel. Nice to meet you." He shook his hand, squeezing it firmly before looking back at Jesse. "You must be Jesse Porter. I'm Richard Engel. Foreign Correspondent for NBC news. I'm so glad you both agreed to an interview. We have a room right this way." He gestured towards the hallway. Porter shut his open mouth and followed his new handler and partner down the hall.


	15. Chapter 15

Jesse Porter was still in shock. Honestly he'd been in shock since Michael had called him this morning and informed him that he was his new boss. Now he'd just been told that a nationally known reporter was actually a spy. His new partner to be exact.

He sat in the little room watching Michael pace the perimeter.

"It's secure man." Engel chuckled. "Trust me. Journalists are more paranoid then spies."Westen turned around and Porter realized his edginess was more about their conversation in the car then their current mission. "How the hell are you?"

Jesse's new partner pulled Michael into his chest and hugged him, clapping him loudly on the back.

"I'm good." Mike smiled.

"You're back!" Richard laughed. "Man I wanted to help you so badly." He shook his head. "I even had my staff leak your story around town. No one took the bait."

"That was probably a bad idea." Westen grunted. "You put yourself at risk."

"Spoken like a true handler. This is gonna be great." He smiled that network worthy smile before dropping down into the desk chair.

"You handle yourself just fine. My jobs going to be staying out of your way." Michael told him pointing a finger. "Jesse however.."

"Yeah. I've been reading his file." Richard shook his head. "Speaking of files, Mike? It's G-a-d-h-a-f-i for Gods sake. You need spell check."

"There are five acceptable spellings." Westen's eyebrows arched. "I like to vary them up. Next time I'll write my reports in Arabic."

"Please. Your Arabic is as shoddy as my Farsi." Engel snorted. "So Jesse." Porter looked up. "I figured we'd talk for a little bit then get you down to tech and have you start training on the equipment."

"Equipment?" The man looked between Westen and Engel. Richards face broke into an amused smile.

"You kept him in the dark?"

"Completely." Michael gave him a stark look.

"I am a 'reporter'." The man quoted the words. "You are now a 'camera man'."

"I'm a camera man." Jesse blinked.

"Yes. So I'm going to send you down to my guys and they are going to teach you how to work a camera. It's not rocket science, once you get used to carrying it you'll be straight." The man nodded. "You have any questions?"

Porter looked at Michael before looking back at Engel.

"What the hell do I call you?" Richard blinked for a second before rolling his eyes at Westen.

"You didn't start that Peacock crap?"

"We were meeting in a freaking hotel room Rich!" Westen moaned. "You want me to carry a sign that says Engel is a spy?"

The other man laughed before turning to Jesse.

"You can call me Richard unless we're in a situation where you have to give information over non-secure channels. Then you can use the company's ridiculous code name for me, okay?" Engel looked at Michael. "I'm assuming he'll be ready to go by tomorrow?"

Westen nodded.

"Good, cause I gotta get back. This shit is a mess." He shook his head. "People don't think about the aftermath before they give the order to shoot." He rolled his eyes again. "No offense though, nice shots. You and Sam?"

"Me and Fi." Michael corrected softly.

"Fiona?" Engel smiled. "You guys still screwing around?"

"Married her." Westen sighed, leaning against the wall.

"No shit?" He smiled. "Congratulations man! I should have known she'd be the only one to clip your wings."

"Only her." Michael agreed.

"Tell her I said Hi."

"I will." He looked back at Jesse, avoiding his eyes. "I'm going to head back now then. Richard can take care of you from here." Porter nodded, looking away. He looked at Engel. "We'll talk soon."

…...

"_Michael?" Fiona slipped into the pool house, looking around the empty room. She shrugged, turning back to the door. It shut quickly, arms circling her from behind. She jumped before relaxing back against the figure behind her. "You scared me."_

_He didn't speak, but she could feel the hot breath against her shoulder. A part of her realizes quickly that it wasn't her husband. He was too tall, his breath too heavy, his chest too dense. _

_She tensed as the rest of her caught up, she assessed her situation, attempted to determine her next move._

"_You're not scared of me are you Fi?" Jesse. It was Jesse. _

"_Jesse." She forced the fear from her voice and turned in his arms, she backed him against the door. "What are you doing here?" She pushed against his chest but she didn't let go. _

"_You know what I'm doing here. You've been avoiding me. Avoiding us."_

"_Us?" She shook her head and tried again to push past him. "I we should-."_

"_Don't deny it." He leered at her. "We've been heading towards this for months." _

"_I don't know what you'r-" He pressed his mouth over hers roughly, stopping her protests completely. Fiona sank to the floor and whimpered. "Jesse please."_

"_Come on. Kiss me like you mean it, Fiona. Kiss me like you did in the car." _

"_Jesse that was work." She pleaded. "It was for the cover."_

_Porter grasped her by the shoulders, turning her body away from the wall._

"_I know you had to pretend it was nothing. I know because of Michael." She kept stepping back, but he kept following. "But I took care of that."_

_She froze. _

"_Took care.."_

"_You don't have to worry about Michael anymore. We can be together." He reached for her and she took another step back tripping over something behind her and tumbling to the floor. She scrambled to her knees, her eyes falling on her obstical._

"_Michael." Her voice was a whisper as she skimmed her arms over her husband. He lay there, eyes blank and open, blood trickling from the edge of his mouth. "Oh God." She pressed her hands to his throat. Nothing. "What did you do?" _

"_I shot him Fi." Jesse's voice was cold. "Don't you remember?" Fiona looked around finding herself back on the road. Watching Sam working feverishly on Michael's battered body, his hands wrist deep in blood as he pulled him away from the SUV. _

"_Fiona. Call it in." Sam yelled at her. "Fi now. Call it in!"  
_

_She shook her head, trying to dislodge the memory. _

"_He lived." She watched Sam and Michael fade away as her mind drew back from the crash site and into the loft._

"_He did, but you won't." She closed her eyes tightly, his voice had turned icy. She heard the click of Sig. She reached for the workbench her nails digging into the wood there._

"_Jesse." She breathed. _

"_I told you I was going to kill the people that burned me. Did you think I forgot? Did you think that I was going to let that go?"_

"_We got passed it." She pleaded._

"_No!" He yelled. _

"_Michael." She whispered softly. _

"_He's not coming." Jesse laughed. _

"_Please.." _

"_You did this." Jesse hissed. "You made me want you. You made me have feelings for you. You knew we couldn't be together unless he was out of the picture"_

_Fiona watched him fall again as Jesse's bullet ripped through him. _

"Michael!" She screamed this time, her body jumping when two strong hands grasped her forearms. "Get away from me!"

"Shh.. Fi it's alright."

"Michael!" She fought back this time, her fists pounding against her offender. "Help me!"

"Shhh. Fiona!" He snapped, sliding her hands against her face. "It's okay."

"Michael.." She brought her hands up to his wrists, tossing them away from her face before burying it against his chest.

"Shhh. It was just a dream. It's alright." He smoothed his hand down her hair and onto her back. "It's alright. You're alright." She whimpered, her fingers grasping tightly against his skin.

He held her, waiting as she calmed herself. Her grip loosened and he leaned them back against the pillows.

"Tell me." He sighed. She flipped her wide eyes to him and shook her head. "Full desensi-."

"Michael I can't. Please just.." Her voice trialed off and she laid her head back on his chest. He kissed her forehead.

"You want me to call Sam?" He asked, trying to hide the twinge of jealousy. She swallowed, looking at his face.

"I'm sorry." She teared up again and he shook his head.

"I'll call him." He exhaled, starting to climb off of the bed.

"Michael." She gasped, her hand grasping his. "Just.." She sniffed. "Can you just hold me for-?"

Westen wrapped his arms back around her, tucking her gently under his chin with a nod.

…...

"No. Mom, I'm sure. We'll be over later." Michael leaned against the wall. "I don't know. She didn't want to tell me. I will. Bye, Mom."

He hung up the phone, wandering around the bare living room.

"Mike?" Sam called opening the door from the back patio.

"She okay Sam?"

"She's better." Axe looked up at him.

"You gonna tell me what this one was about?" He snorted.

"She's trying to protect you." Sam sighed.

"I know." Michael groaned. "And it's making me nuts."

"Well this isn't going to help that any." Sam lifted his eyebrows. "I need you to call Jesse and get him over here."

"Sam.."

"She needs to do this before he leaves." His friend interrupted.

"She was terrified. She hasn't had one like this since-." Westen shook his head.

"Exactly." Axe pointed at him. "She's ready for the next step and Jesse's the next step."

They held each others eyes for a moment. Michael tried to think of an excuse while Sam tried to hold his ground. He smiled when Michael's eyes rolled away with a groan before stepping in a circle before pulling out his cell phone.

"Jesse. I need you to meet Sam and Fi at the loft." He grit his teeth. "Do me a favor and leave your Sig in your glove box this time."


	16. Chapter 16

**I hate disclaimers. I never use them. They are pointless.. if a writer or producer actually decided to take the time to sue you over copy rights? A disclaimer will not help you_ at all_.. Seriously. Besides it's a fan fiction site. Does anyone think that you are the shows creator or writer? No. Does anyone actually think we get paid for this? um no.. **

**However.. a ff friend made a valid point. Richard Engel _is_ a real person with a real reputation to protect.. and I am not him.. nor do I own him.. I do read his tweets like he is writing them just to me.. but nothing I write is anything that he has actually said.. so in good faith I should say so. And as far as I know he's _not_ actually a spy.. but a girl can dream. ;) Disclaimed.**

…...

Sam opened the door slowly, keeping his eyes on Fiona. She sat on a stool behind the counter, running her teeth over her lips.

"Hey Jesse come on in." He backed up a few steps but still stayed ridiculously close. "Uhh.. I have to ask you.." He looked at the floor. "If you're armed."

Porter took a breath, reaching behind him and handing Sam his handgun. Axe winced a little before jerking his head towards the workbench. Jesse widened his eyes at him. "Please?"

The tall man put his palms on the wooden surface and let his friend frisk him. He watched Sam nod at Fiona before sighing.

"I'll be up there." He told her softly, pointing to the loft. She watched him go, before switching her eyes to the counter.

"Fi? Why am I here?" Jesse asked, walking towards her.

"Desensitization." She smiled weakly, pushing her arms away from the counter and glancing up at the loft where Sam sat pretending to read the paper. Fiona took a deep breath and let it out just as slowly. He watched her back up into the sink, pointing at another stool. "Sit."

He realized she wanted the counter between them, swallowing hard and dropping onto the seat.

"What do I do?"

"Nothing." She pressed her lips together. "I just need to tell you some things." She hopped up on the counter balancing at the edge of the sink. "I've loved Michael for almost twelve years. He's the only person I've ever-." She stopped looking back at Sam before lowering her voice. "..put before my own needs. Well maybe not all the time." She grinned. "You came into our lives Jesse, under odd circumstances."

"Odd?" Porter started, before noticing how her body winced back. Her hand grasped the faucet to keep from falling in. Jesse heard the newspaper rattle and glanced back at Sam. He was starring at Fiona.

"How 'bout you let the lady talk?" He ordered gently. The tall CIA agent nodded.

Fiona wet her lips slipping off of the sink and walking to the refrigerator before grabbing a spoon with her other hand. Jesse could make out her Walther in the silverware drawer. He watched her play with her yogurt, trying to calm herself.

"He never meant for it to happen, but it did and it altered the course of your life without your permission and he's sorry for that. He never set out to hurt you, none of us did. He did and we couldn't undo it, so he protected you. He could have left you out there in the wind alone. Then for all your protesting that you were used, he kept protecting you. He could have turned you over to Vaughn. He didn't. He brought you on our team. He let you move in with his mother for God's sake!" She shook his head back and fourth. "He _protected_ you and what did you do? You got the hots for his girlfriend, held a gun to my head, _shot him. _Blew up my house.." She stopped, her chest heaving and her eyes on the loft. "And you still had the nerve to act like the injured party.."

"Fi." Jesse croaked.

"And he's _still_ protecting you."

"Fiona I'm sorry."

"I was so hard on him." She smiled a sickeningly sad smile. "I was so hard on him for what he did to you."

"Fi." His voice was ridiculously soft her eyes slipped to his. "I thought we got past this. All that stuff about how you and Mike and Sam had forgiven each other."

"We are past it." She gestured between the two of them before tapping her temple with her finger. "My subconscious just didn't get the memo."

"You're still having nightmares.." His voice trailed off.

"Not as often." She drew her back up straight and sighed. "So you and your new partner leave tomorrow?"

He furrowed his eyebrows at her rapid change of topic.

"Yeah, so you won't have to go out of your way to avoid me." He tested.

"Oh it was no problem. Michael did most of the grunt work on that."

"Heard you bought a house."

"Yes." She smiled, turning and dropping his spoon in the sink. "Maybe when you come back he'll allow you inside of it."

"You actually think I'm going to hurt you?"

"No." She shook her head.

"But?"

"The dreams make me.. unsteady." She admitted, swallowing hard. "I'm not very good at being unsteady." He nodded at her, deciding that may be the biggest understatement yet.

"On that note." Sam's voice makes them both jump. He shakes his head before jogging down the steps holding Mike's Sig in his palm. Fiona looked at her shoes as Sam set the gun on the workbench with a thunk. "Let's do this."

"What are we doing?" Jesse whispered. Fiona didn't answer, she just swallowed and made her way over to Sam.

"You need to come over here and mess with this." Sam held his eyes for a minute before looking at Fi. "Fiona's gonna watch you." He raised his eyebrows at her. "And I'm going to watch her." He stepped back a few feet before dropping onto the bed. "Go on."

"Mess with it?"

"Load it, unload it. Cock it. Put the safety on." He waved his hands. "Mess with it."

"Can we talk.. while I?"

"Sure Jesse." Fiona's voice was tense and annoyed. "What do you want to chat about?"

He looked up from the Sig, watching her chest rise and fall.

"Um.. So I'm headed back to Libya." He informed her, dropping the clip from the Sig and slowly rolling each bullet with his finger before loading it again. Fiona flinched, her eyes on the gun. "But you probably already know that."

"Yeah." She breathed. "Funny how we leave and the place goes to hell. I hope it wasn't a waist of my bullet."

"There's an interesting topic." He kept his voice even, almost gentle. "If I'm dangerous then why'd you pick me as your partner in Libya?"

Fiona swallowed.

"Don't flatter yourself. You're irrational not dangerous and I didn't pick you as my partner I picked Sam as Michael's." She told him, her voice sounding almost normal.

"Ah." Jesse raised his eyebrows, lifting the weapon and aiming it over her shoulder. Fiona dug her nails into the wood. He glanced at her hand before slowly lowering it.

"Sam." She breathed.

"You're doing great." Sam called back to her. Jesse licked his lips before pointing the gun at the floor and putting one in the chamber. Fiona's breath caught.

"Apparently, Tripoli is going to hell in hand basket." Jesse sounded almost pained as he disengaged the weapon.

"I really did think you were going to kill me." He had to strain to hear her. Sam swallowed hard, watching the crease of her forehead. Jesse froze.

"Maybe so did I at first." He said calmly, setting the gun down on the counter. "I felt betrayed."

"More by me than Michael?" She asked softly, he shrugged. "Michael thinks it was about him, hurting him, more than it was about me."

Jesse ran his tongue over his teeth and looked back up at her. She carefully raised her eyes to his.

"Michael's a pretty damn smart guy." Jesse held her fragile gaze. "I wanted to take something away from him." She looked at the floor. "I didn't shoot you because you were you." She nodded and he slowly pushed the Sig across the workbench to him. "Wanna hold it on me?"

"Not today." She snickered, before shaking her head.

"Sam can I talk to Fi for a minute?" He asked.

"Fi?" Sam looked at her. She smiled, setting her own hand on the Sig and pulling it towards herself, before nodding at him. "I'll be on the balcony."

"I just want to know." He asked softly. "In another world.. one with out Michael Westen..." He looked at her.

"Jesse." Fiona tucked her husband's gun in her waist band before putting her hand over his. "I don't even want to theorize right now about a world with out Michael Westen."

He nodded at her briefly before she turned her face towards the balcony.

"Sam! I'm going home!" She called with a smile walking over and opening the door.

"You need a ride?" He called walking back in. She shook her head slowly, the grin on her face spreading.

"No." Her sing song voice left Sam no doubt who she was looking at. "I think I have one. Just couldn't stay away from the action could you?" She teased, climbing down the steps. She stood between his legs as he leaned against his car arms crossed.

"How'd it go?" He asked, flatly.

"Well.." She tugged at his arms until they dropped to wrap around her waist. "No one got shot." She looped her arms around his head.

"That's not funny." He sighed, shaking his head slowly.

"It's a little funny." She pressed her lips to his. He shook his head as they broke apart. "You used to have a sense of humor Michael."

"When was that, exactly?" He asked puzzled. She giggled at him before leaning against his chest.

"Are we still meeting your mom for lunch?" She asked as he sighed, relaxing his hold on her.

"She's at our house waiting for the appliances to be delivered." He huffed. "I told her we'd pick up something."

"I love you." She told him, lifting her lips and pressing them to his carotid artery.

"You better." He mused. "I just bought you five thousand dollars worth of stainless steel appliances."

"There's that dry inappropriate Westen sense of humor." She quipped, pulling away with playful annoyance as he opened the door for her.

"Sam," Mike called, looking up at where he and Jesse stood in the door way. "You coming?"

"Uh.." He looked at Porter. Westen shut the car door and glanced at his wife she nodded, looking past him to the other men.

"Jesse." His voice was tight. "You got plans for lunch?"

…...


	17. Chapter 17

**This story started out as a test to see if I could write a mission story. I give my self a C on that test, but it is my first try. I think I can get better. It ended up being a very sweet little look at Sam being the great guy he is. We also got a look at Michael floundering to be human and I got to harrass Jesse a little for holding that forgotton gun in her face oh so long ago. **

**My ThirdWatch gang knows I like to write stories in threes, so they will not be surprised that I am already working on the next part. Gotta fill those bedrooms.. and improve my mission writing. Maybe I could take lessions from_ Escribe?_**

**Thanks all.**

**Lori**

_..._

"I just can't imagine anyone believing you were a baptist minister!" Maddy chuckled.

"Funny how I could be Fiona's father though huh?" He asked. She started laughing harder.

Sam shook his head, pushing back his chair and joining Michael in the kitchen. Westen was still removing the tape and plastic bindings from his new appliances.

"Will you be careful!" Fiona squawked, watching him hiss and yank back his finger before putting it in his mouth. "I told you to use the scissors." He frowned at her, but took the tool she'd thrust towards him. "If you scratch my dishwasher I'll cut you myself."

"Fi."

"Yeah Sam." She asked distractedly, picking up pieces of wrapping off the floor of the kitchen.

"I think you need to show Jesse the pool house while he's here." She froze, still bent at the waist. He watched her drop the trash and put her hands on her thighs.

"Pool house?" Michael asked, his finger still between his lips.

"Fi?" Sam blinked.

"Okay." She said softly, pushing back up again. Westen watched her carefully.

"What's the p-?" She ran her hand through his hair before leaving the kitchen.

"Don't cut your fingers off, Michael." She sighed. "Jesse? Can I show you the pool house?"

"You need me for this?" Sam asked her, watching her head shake.

"Fi?" Her husband asked again crossing the floor to her.

"Go finish the kitchen. I need to get this finished before we start working on the _bedrooms_." She told him, narrowing her eyes and tossing her hand back over her shoulder. He nodded with a sigh before creeping back into the kitchen.

"Pool house?" Jesse asked brightly. "I didn't even know you had a pool." She turned slowly and started towards the french doors.

"I can show you that too." She smiled, almost reaching her eyes.

…...

"This thing you're doing with Fiona." Maddy asked quietly after the door shut behind them. "Desensationalizing.."

"Desensitization, Ma." Michael sighed, collecting the trash she'd disregarded.

"Whatever! You sure you know what your doing?" She bit the tip of her finger.

"Don't worry, Maddy." Sam whispered. "We've done this before."

"I mean, doesn't she need a doctor? A psychologist?" Madelyn looked between the two of them.

"Mom, if you could get Fiona to see a psychologist I'd be all for it." Michael grunted.

"Sure, just make sure she's unarmed when you bring it up." Axe hummed.

"It's the best option we have. She's not going to go to a professional. She's not going to take medication. This is the next best way, therapists use it to treat PTSD all the time. Sam's been through it before. He knows what he's doing."

"You?" Madelyn looked at her friend.

"Yeah I went through a hard time, 'bout a decade ago. A buddy of mine, Military Psychologist, did this for me."

"She's already better Mom. She just needs some time." Michael whispered as the door swung open and Jesse and Fi slipped back in.

"Man. That is sweet out there." Jesse chucked his thumb over his shoulder. The three of them all had their eyes on Fiona. She chuckled a little, Sam grinned and Westen slowly exhaled. Madelyn Westen was studying her daughter in law.

"I think we can put it to use." She sang, coming to stand beside her husband. He felt his body start to relax when he felt no tension from her small frame. "Don't you Michael?"

"I'm sure we will." He said dryly, before dropping his eyes to hers. She smiled back at him.

…...

Fiona continued rubbing a towel against her damp hair as she slipped back from the master bathroom. She stopped staring at her husband on the bed. Her heart sank a little, when he didn't flinch. If he was asleep and someone walked into the room his body would have shown at least some reaction.

He was exhausted, she mused, letting her eyes slide up and down his form.

"How long are you going to stare at me?" He mumbled, without opening his eyes. She smiled before sliding in bed to his left. He sighed as she cuddled into his side.

"You need sleep." Her voice had that edge. That edge that everyone else would think was irritation, but he knew better.

"I'm okay Fi." he whispered.

"Michael.." She turned her head back up to look at him, drawing her fingers against his tired face. "Maybe you should go to the loft."

His eyes clicked open and he looked at her in confusion.

"You kicking me out already?" He asked blankly, still avoiding her concern. "I thought it would take at least a month."

"Stop it." She pushed up from his chest and looked at him. "I know what it feels like to be too nervous to sleep."

"I'm not-."

"You don't have to stand watch over me Michael." She smiled sadly. "If you went to the loft-."

"I wouldn't be able to sleep there either." He told her, his voice it's usual easy timber.

"What if I we sleep in shifts?" Fiona offered, her eyes shining.

"Fi." He rubbed his face with his palm. "I'm f-."

"Don't make me call Sam." He winced before absently stroking her cheek.

"If I'm paying attention I can-." He closed his palm over her face.

"I know." She covered his hand with hers. "But Michael I need to do this."

"You want me to go to the loft?" He exhaled slowly, squeezing his eyes shut.

"I want you to sleep." She whispered. She watched his eyes lazily open into hers, smiling at the memory of his own words.

"We've been here before." He raised an eyebrow at her and he pulled her back against him.

"Yes we have." She said softly, wiggling up to his lips and pressing hers against them.

"This is a new direction." He raised his eyebrows weakly.

"You're exhausted." She hummed, he grunted back his disappointment.

"I am." He admitted softly as her fingers swept up and down his face. His eyelids flickered closed.

"Sleep." She coaxed, tucking her face under his chin. "It's alright."

…...

"Where's Mike?" Sam asked as Fiona tossed the door to the loft open and stomped inside, shaking the rain from her trench coat.

"Working." She groaned. "He's meeting me here."

"Something wrong?" Sam's eyebrows rose.

"I don't think so. I think it's just their regular every other week check in a few days early." She dropped one of hers bag of supplies on the counter and Sam helped her unpack it.

"Doesn't that make it irregular?"

"Sam." She rolled her eyes. "How about you ask Michael when he gets back?"

He stopped to stare at her as she started tearing the duct tape into strips.

"Nah. I don't think I really care." He sighed.

"Well, anyway. I wanted to tell you something." She told him airily, shifting her eyes over to where he had begun coiling her wire. She reached back into the other bag distractedly.

"You haven't changed the plan again Fi. Have you?" He rolled his eyes. "Because I'm going to forget what I'm supposed to be doing and just start mashing all the different ones toget-." He stopped talking when she slammed a six pack onto the counter in front of him.

"Thank you." She hissed.

"For what?" He furrowed his eyebrows at her.

"One for each week-." She pointed at each beer, boldly raised her eyes to him. "Nightmare free."

They stood there staring at each other until the door swung open again and Westen stomped in, tossing his black umbrella across the floor.

"God I'm starving. Tell me we have yogurt." He ran his eyes quickly over the progress at the table.

"We have yogurt." His wife sighed, kicking her shopping bag towards him, he picked it up looked towards the counter. He pulled out a beer, holding it up to Sam. He took it with a smile as Michael carried the other five to the fridge.

"Your welcome." Axe whispered, handing her the coiled wire.

…...


End file.
